More Than A Memory
by seriouslyjess
Summary: Based on the Garth Brooks song. As she stared out into the busy hospital she felt her breathing quicken and she clutched the blanket desperate for something – anything.Who the hell was she?
1. Prologue

**So I shouldn't be starting another fic, but this one has been bouncing around in my head for awhile and I don't think that this story-line has ever been used. I'm almost done with two fics. The end of La Vita De... should be up in the next few days. Thanks to SiriusBlack123 for beating**

* * *

** More Then A Memory**

**Prologue**

She was done. Finished. Kaput. It was over. She had quit and she was never going back.

The road and the radio. Those were her two companions. And some CD's that she had. Kenny Cheney's familiar voice wafted through the speakers and she smiled.

Chase had called her, and so had Foreman. They had both accepted their old positions back.

_Why don't you come back too Allison?_

It was true; Cuddy had offered Cameron her old job back, House had too. More money, more cases, more responsibility, more everything.

It was a life that she didn't want. Had never wanted. Dr. Allison Cameron no longer existed. The one that she had been anyway. Now she was a stranger in her own skin. The drawn face in the mirror wasn't her. Wasn't who she had been.

And so, she had told Chase that she couldn't with a tired smile in her voice. He had seemed to understand, and the good-bye had been peaceful – two old friends parting ways.

She had told him she was going to California, but that was a complete lie.

The Rocky Mountains seemed to watch her as she drove down the winding road.

Billings, Montana was her destination of choice. She had grown up horseback riding – the tale was she rode before she walked, cantered before she ran – and it was probably true.

She was going back to her roots, so to speak. Sure, she was still going to be a doctor, but she would have the time to ride, to be free, to have a life.

The rising sun was something that warmed her heart even as she thought of her painful memories with Chase.

If she wasn't in love with someone else they might have worked out.

* * *

House sat there staring at the bottle of whiskey.

He normally only drank scotch, but tonight he was in a whiskey kind of mood.

Cameron was officially gone. She had left him.

_She_ had left _him_. Just so that was clear to everyone.

He had known that someone was going to get hurt, which was why he had stayed away from her. And he was right. Someone had gotten hurt.

_He_ had gotten hurt. And so had she.

And now she was gone. He took a sip of his whiskey.

It was going to be a long night.

* * *

She woke up in an unfamiliar bed, in an unfamiliar room. Her heart rate increased and she tried to sit up but found she couldn't.

Her arm was in a cast, her ribs had made some sort of protest when she finally heaved her self into a sitting position, and she felt very dizzy.

_First question, where the hell am I? Second question, how did I get here? Third ques-_

No. Scratch that. It was definitely her first question. And as she stared out into the busy hospital she felt her breathing quicken and she clutched the blanket desperate for something – anything.

_Who the hell was she?_

* * *

_Two Months Later_

House sat there staring at the phone. He wanted to call Wilson, hear false reassurances. Lies. But he wouldn't he needed to move on. He needed to be able to dream without seeing her face, to turn the corner without hearing her voice, to drink a cup of coffee without thinking her handing him his red cup.

It had been two months. Sixty days. One thousand four hundred and forty hours.

He kept hearing the detectives' voice in his head two days after the car was found. It was incinerated.

They found bones, and some blonde hair. But that was it. There wasn't enough of anything to get DNA from, so the cops assumed. Shook their heads muttered _what a pity_ and moved on.

_I'm sorry Sir, there's nothing we can do._ That's what he had been told.

That was a God Damn lie. There was a lot they could do. But she was a woman who had voluntarily up and left.

Not some missing child. Not some woman abducted against her will. But she was gone. And he was still here.

Cameron had told Chase that she was going to California, Foreman that she was off to Texas and Wilson that New York was her next stop.

Everybody lies, right?

And now she was gone.

Completely utterly gone.

The puzzle of Allison Cameron had been solved, but not by figuring her out.

By seeing her family and friends at her funeral.

By listening to an old woman pull him down to her level to thank him, because Allison would call and tell her about how interesting work was.

How days that Allie smiled were rare since she was ten.

How much pain had filled her young life.

She was only thirty three.

And she was gone.

Tears fell silently down his face in the dead of the night.

* * *

It will get happier, I promise. Let me know what you think.

Jess


	2. Chapter 1

**So here's the next chapter. We Are Family should be up tomorrowish, but tomorrows Halloween, so maybe not. :)**

* * *

**Chapter 1: Repercussions Of Missing**

"House?" He turned to look at Thirteen and raised an eyebrow.

"What?"

"You had Amber and I sort your mail – this letter was marked as personal."

She held a small envelope in her hands.

"We decided to give it to you before opening it. Do you want me to open it?"

House snatched the letter from her and examined it before shoving it in his pocket. He would read it later.

Thirteen was staring at him and House gripped his cane tighter before turning away.

They knew about Cameron – not a lot – but enough to look at him and wonder what had ever gone on between the two.

Thirteen - she was nothing like Cameron - a poor substitute at best.

* * *

"I don't know what to do anymore Wilson." Cuddy paced restlessly in her office.

"He's doing his clinic hours, he's not making anyone cry, he's being courteous, he hasn't made any lewd comments on my clothes or done anything that would require legal action in months. He's still keeping up that ridiculous game with his interns, but he doesn't have his heart in it anymore. There's no fire in him anymore."

"It's because she's gone."

Wilson stared out the window quietly. It was raining, which seemed appropriate.

"When Cameron was alive-" his voice caught but he tried to continue "House always knew that he could find her. That he could beg her to come back or pretend that she didn't exist. But now – now it's real. Now he can't do that."

"So what do we do?"

Wilson laughed, but there was no humor in it.

"Can you bring her back to life?"

* * *

"Hey Chase, do you want to get a drink?"

He looked up and met Foreman's eyes. Paperwork rested in front of him in the cafeteria. His one goal for the past few months had been simple: keep busy.

"Why?" His voice was raspy.

"She would have wanted us to."

"What, get drunk?"

"I told her that we would never be friends. That we would never be anything more then colleagues. And I meant it. I stabbed her with a needle. I stole her article. And then I almost died and she forgave me. Like that." He snapped his fingers.

"As soon as everything ended – as soon as I was okay we went back to colleagues. When the two of you were having your little thing."

Foreman faltered for a moment.

"I should have been looking out for her. All she ever wanted was friendship. So now, I think that she would want us to be friends. To at least try anyway."

"You're honoring her memory? Why? Because you feel _guilty_?" Chase snorted. "That's rich."

He stormed out and left Foreman standing there.

* * *

She had a routine.

Get up, get dressed, eat breakfast.

After that she would go down to the stables and spend the morning with the horses. She would take a lunch break at noon with some friends or by herself. She would do paper work until two and then she would teach lessons for the rest of the day until about five.

After five she would go home, shower, change, eat dinner and then it would vary. Some nights she would go out, or watch T.V., read a book.

At some point she would look at the missing person websites and see if there was anyone who liked like her. Anyone she could point at and say with certainty _that's me._

There were many days that she wanted to give up. Completely fall into being Alexis Peters, horseback riding instructor in Rudyard, Montana. Population 275.

Then she would look at the sign she had hanging in her bedroom at the house that she shared with three other people.

_Somewhere someone can't go on,  
They've given up hope.  
Their hope is gone.  
Somewhere there's a heart that cries,  
Where everything is seen  
Through sorrows eyes_

Eventually she would find her family. And while doing so she would find herself.

* * *

"Hey Alex, how you feeling?"

"I'm okay."

Dr. Richard Woods smiled at her kindly. They went through the same routine every time that she was here. Alexis probably had it memorized by now.

"Any headaches lately?"

"One."

"What happened?"

"I was there when Timmy Jones fell off his horse."

Dr. Woods nodded. He had been the one to treat the seven year old whose horse had been frightened by thunder and bucked the child off. Richard had already heard the story, but wanted to hear her version.

"I was the first one there. I had been taking care of Hank – ya'know, letting him walk, putting him through his paces. Timmy just got the wind knocked out of him really. His head hit the jump a little bit. He'll have a tiny scat. Head wounds bleed a lot - and I wouldn't let them move him in case he had done any damage to his spine. I knew that I had to keep him conscience. And I don't know why. After that I got a headache."

Her rambling style allowed random old facts to slip through. Like the thing about head wounds. It was something that doctors repeated – but was also said on TV.

The headaches were a sign. Something that would happen sometimes. If Alexis tried to remember her past she would get a migraine-like headache that would have her in agony.

"I think that you used to be a doctor Alex."

She stopped swinging her feet and stared at him.

"What?"

"Look at the facts."

"What facts?"

"Do you remember what I told you about the headaches?"

"Well, right after you became my doctor you said that the amnesia was temporary. Then, when I came back and still had no memory, but was getting the really bad headaches you said that it was because my memory was trying to come back but I was repressing it because the bad outweighed the good."

"Do you see my point?"

"That I used to be a doctor? No."

"You know a lot of medical facts Alex. You're always the one the kids go to at the stables if they need help."

"Maybe I'm just good with kids. Maybe I used to be a teacher. Or a nurse. Or an axe murderer. How do you know?"

"I think I may know who you were. I'd like to contact some people Alex. Bring them in."

She sighed – resigned.

"Only if you know for sure. I don't want to go around breaking people's hearts."

Woods nodded. He had already sent the letter. He was just waiting for a response.

* * *

"Hello, I'm Dr. House." He glanced up from the file to see a girl sitting and her father hovering anxiously.

"What seems to be the problem Tina?"

"I'm fine."

"She's sick."

House looked between father and daughter.

"Okay, but what seems to be the problem?" he repeated it slower as if it would make more sense to them that way.

"I coughed." the girl spat out.

"You were coughing so hard that you couldn't breath and you were coughing up blood. You have a fever too."

"I'm fine."

House looked between the two. "Chest x-ray for you. Any headaches lately?"

"Yes." Tina glowered at him.

"And she hasn't been eating." A cell phone rang and the man looked at it.

"I'll be right back."

"Don't bother" Tina shot back.

House dragged a stool over and sat down.

"You can keep going with the questions ya'know. It'll be a while before he comes back. He's talking to _Maureen_."

"Maureen?"

"His girlfriend."

"Parents divorced?"

"No." her voice was quiet. "My mom died six months ago from cancer. She made my dad promise that he would move on, but I'm not ready."

House just nodded.

"He thinks that I can just write her off. They were having problems. Had been for a while. He doesn't get it."

"Get what?"

"She's more. She's still here."

House looked at her, wondering if the kid needed a psyche evaluation.

"Not like _that_. She's still here." A hand went over her heart. "I'm not afraid to forget her, but no one will ever take her place. He doesn't understand that she's still my mom and the fact that she's gone doesn't make what I feel just go away. Sop you see, she's more then just in my head. She's more then just a memory. She's in my heart too. And nothing will ever make that go away."

House just stared at her.

She got it.

Why didn't anyone else?

* * *

So let me know what you thought.

Jess


	3. Chapter 2

I'm back. This chapter is a little background information. I'm working on the next chapter of A Hell Of A Reunion. It'll be up soon. Thanks to SeriousBlack123 for betaing

* * *

**Chapter 2: Letters and Meanings**

Two hours ago he had diagnosed Tina with pneumonia and sent her on her way. She had smiled at him and thanked him before she left.

"_That's for what?"_

_Tina hopped off the table._

"_For listening. Not many people do." She turned her hand on the doorknob._

"_Ya'know? It was almost better that she had cancer because we knew she was leaving us. All of the pain and suffering that happened because of it – it was almost worth it because my last words to her were 'Mom I love you'. Not 'I hate you' or 'good-bye' but I love you."_

_A small smile danced across her face._

"_I'll see you around Doctor House." And before he could get in another word she had slipped out._

He wished that he had Tina's calm confidence when it came to talking about her mother's death.

But it was Cameron that he hadn't said good-bye to. He could clearly remember their last conversation. He had gone to plead with her about her job like he had two years previous.

_Flashback_

"_What do you want House?" _

_Cameron opened her door to her apartment and rested her head on the jamb. She looked tired and thin but he ignored it._

"_I want you to come back and work for me."_

"_I already talked to Cuddy and said no."_

"_But I'm charming and you love me. Come back."_

"_No."_

"_Lover boy is."_

"_That just gives me another reason to say no."_

"_No it doesn't. What do you want? Another date?"_

"_I want you to leave me alone."_

"_If you wanted me to leave you alone you would have slammed the door in my face."_

_She glared at him and slammed the door in his face._

"_You're going to regret this Cameron. Come back to work for me."_

"_No." And that had been it. A week later he had been at her funeral saying good-bye and wishing for another chance._

And now here he was two months later sitting in his office with almost all the lights off.

It was almost one in the morning but he couldn't bring himself to leave.

House stared at the letter.

His throat constricted and he blinked as if trying to make sure that the words were real and hadn't rearranged themselves just to spite him.

Nope, still there.

He wondered who was sick enough to send him the letter. If it was all some sick joke.

But it couldn't be.

House chanced a glance at the picture he held.

It couldn't be.

But it had to be. Because if it wasn't then he was going crazy.

_Dr. House-_

_My name is Richard Woods and I'm a doctor in Montana in a town called Rudyard. I'm writing you about your old fellow Dr. Cameron. Two months ago there was a car accident on the outskirts of our town. The woman that we were able to get from one of the cars had no ID on her and everything else was incinerated. When she woke up from her coma two weeks later she couldn't remember who she was and was diagnosed with traumatic amnesia._

_Over the months that she has been with us nothing has come back to her. We believe that she has dissociative amnesia. After discussing it over with some other doctors I came to believe that Alexis Peters (as we call her) is the same woman as your Allison Cameron. Any reply would be greatly appreciated. We want to help Alexis find her family and herself. I've enclosed a picture of Alexis and my business card. She has agreed to meet someone who may know who she is. If you would like to come out and meet her please give me a call._

_Dr. Richard Woods M.D._

She was only thirty three when she had been taken but maybe there was a chance at getting her back.

But was he the right person? The one who should go out to Rudyard and bring her back?

Their relationship had never been a stable one. She was pining after him and he was pretending he didn't care. Then he was running after Stacy and she was telling him she was over him. There was an HIV scare, monster trucks and a date gone so horribly wrong.

He wanted to go to Montana and grab her, bring her back to New Jersey and never let her leave.

But what if she remembered right away?

All the pain that he had caused her. The three years of snarkiness and sharp barbs to hide anything he felt for her.

Maybe it would be better if he sent Wilson.

* * *

Alexis stepped into her house and slid the keys on her assigned ring.

"Alex?"

"Yeah, I'm home."

Iris Berkley, one of her roommates stepped out of the kitchen.

Her name fit her personality. 'Colorful, rainbow' was shown through her bright clothes and flaming red hair. Green eyes were always sparkling with laughter. Freckles covered her nose and were sprinkled across her cheeks.

She was a chef at one of the small town restaurants that she had taken over for her parents.

"What do you want for dinner?"

"I don't know. Pizza?"

"That works. Eddie called."

Edward. Wealthy guardian.

Dark brown hair and imposing height at about six five. Those who didn't know of his fun loving nature and practical jokes feared him.

Dark brown eyes were full of warmth and love. He was currently dating Iris and the two clashed constantly but loved every minute of it.

There was never a dull moment in the house.

The oldest of the four at thirty-four (they assumed that Alex was about thirty-two) he was a judge. It was his house that the four resided in.

Eddie was usually teased by them and they called him Judge Nash.

"What did he say?"

"They're working late tonight."

By 'they' she meant Edward and Olivier.

He was the final person in their small family. Olive tree.

Alex connected Olive trees with peace. With olive branches. And that's what Olivier was, the peace keeper of the town.

He didn't have an imposing presence at only 5'7 and murky blue eyes. He had blonde hair and an infectious smile with dimples. He reminded her of a child some days and could always get her to laugh.

He was a teacher, but was there to smooth things over between adults and children alike. Which was why he was probably with Eddie taking care of something important in the town.

'Mr. Trotter' was the favorite teacher of the town and was liked by everyone.

And then there was Alexis Peters.

Defender of men.

She had no idea what that had to do with herself.

"Alex?"

"What? Sorry."

"I lost you for a minute there."

"I was thinking."

"About names again?"

"I can't help it."

Alexis had no background, no anything. Names fascinated her and so did history. She wanted to know _who_ she was.

"Rich called me."

"What'd he want?" Alex hopped onto the counter and Iris handed her a beer.

"To tell me that he thought you were a doctor."

"What does that have to do with my name?"

"If you were a doctor you were the defender of men. Against diseases."

Alex grinned "I like it."

"I thought you would. So you said pizza for dinner? Are you hungry or do you want to make if from scratch?"

"Scratch. And then let's go to the bar and maybe meet O and E there."

Iris laughed. The town had given the four of them the nickname of 'A, E, I, O.' Or 'the Vowels.'

"Okay. What do you want on the pizza?"

"Pepperoni and mushroom."

* * *

Miles and states away sat a blue eyed man.

He was ready. All he had to do was call Cuddy. A bag was packed and a ticket was purchased. He had called Richard Woods, and was going to meet him at the airport in Great Falls, Montana about 90 miles away.

Wilson didn't know where he was going. Or why. All he was going to say was that he needed a vacation.

No need to get anyone else's hopes up.

He would find Allison Cameron one way or another.

And then he would never let her go again.

* * *

So...? 


	4. Chapter 3

So I'm back! Sorry it took so long. Thanks to my beat SiriusBlack123.

* * *

**Chapter 3: Three Days and Mistaken Identities**

Alex and Iris made pizza from scratch – having quite the time trying to flip them like chefs did and dancing around the kitchen.

By the time the pizza was in the oven they were covered in flour and sauce.

They took one look at each other and burst into laughter.

"So, my vote is that we eat our amazing pizza, save some for the guys and then go to the bar."

The bar was the local gathering place to hang out, and drink or dance if you desired.

Johnny – the owner – was an older man in his sixties who spent the mornings playing crossing guard at the elementary school and the afternoon helping out at whatever odd jobs needed to be done. At night he would open his small bar and the town would go in to sit and talk.

There was dancing to the old songs on the creaky jukebox, alcohol and lots of small tables to sit and talk to people.

"We can call O and E after dinner and see where they are and if they can meet us."

* * *

"Welcome to Great Falls Montana and thank you for flying American Airlines."

House very nearly jumped out of his seat with a gruff "Cripple, coming through."

The flight had been delayed, and he had been unable to contact Dr. Woods to let him know. He hoped that he was still there.

As soon as he stepped off the plane he nervously began to scan the area. He had no idea what the man looked like.

The picture that he had been sent had been of four people. Two men, a woman and Cameron.

Cameron had been grinning brilliantly into the camera, eyes bright and hopeful.

Even after everything she still hadn't lost her hope.

Maybe she had enough for both of them. He had lost his for the first time years ago when he woke up to find half of his thigh muscle missing.

Hope had returned a little when she drifted into his life.

So naive, so full of life, so trusting. A little hope had drifted back into his life only to be torn away with a simple crash and a phone call.

"Dr. House?"

He spun around to look at an older man.

Richard Woods was in his early fifties and his hair was a speckled pepper color. Brown eyes stared at House, calm and serious.

"You must be Dr. Woods."

"Call me Richard please."

"Call me House."

"Did you bring a bag or just that?"

Richard seemed to understand that House wasn't there for pleasantries. He was there to find Cameron.

And that was all.

If it was Cameron.

But it had to be Cameron.

Because House wasn't sure if he could do it all again.

No one knew but two weeks after the funeral he had gotten a phone call from an old friend from his army brat days.

Yes, he did have friends beside Wilson.

"That girl that used to work for you?"

"Cameron?"

He had immediately perked up.

"My boss wanted me to call you." Patrick Obstoys' voice was hesitant.

He lived in California and worked as the head of the ER there.

His boss was the hospital head.

"Yeah?"

"We had a woman come in two days ago. She had a picture of your department that Cuddy had made you take when you did that article."

After Sebastian Charles left the newspapers had discovered them. The four diagnostics that had saved him.

They had been forced to do an interview.

House had gotten out of two weeks of clinic for it, but still. They had to give an interview.

The reporters had insisted on a picture as well. In the conference room.

House had stood between Foreman and Chase. Cameron had stood in front of him, the photographer insisting that it looked better that way.

He could remember the smell of her shampoo. He had always assumed that it would be some floral sent. Lavender. Or maybe not floral, but vanilla.

Instead it had been cucumbers and green tea.

He had spotted the green tea smell immediately but it had taken him a little while to identify the cucumber.

For some reason the smell had fit her.

It was sweet, but not overly so. Not to where it was fake.

The picture had been with the article and for weeks after that they had gotten e-mails, phone calls and letters. Requests for help, letters of admiration. All that stuff.

"What about it?"

"She was in a car accident and her face is to badly burned and scarred right now to know who she is. She hasn't been able to speak yet, but they want you to come out and look and see if it's Dr. Cameron."

So he had with a small ray of hope.

The hope had been crushed the moment he looked into deep brown eyes.

She was sick and was hoping that Dr. House and his team could cure her.

They did end up curing her, but all House would say was that an old friend called and asked a favor.

No one knew how he got the case.

He never told them about Cameron. It would hurt them more then it would hurt him.

And he was hurt.

Deeply.

* * *

Wilson sat and stared at the short note taped to his computer in Houses' familiar chicken scratch. He had become used to deciphering it on the rare days that House wrote something himself, but he was sure that he was reading it wrong.

_Jimmy-_

_Went to Montana. Need time. I'll call you. Everything is fine._

_Greg_

The fact that he had signed his first name meant it was personal.

And not just any kind of personal. Very personal. Something to do with Stacy no doubt. Or his parents. Or maybe even Cameron.

Wilson rubbed his head. He could count on his hands, Cuddy's hands, Foreman's hands and Chase's hands the times that he had gotten Greg out of trouble. And he would still have times left over.

Be it something as small as letting him hide from Clinic Duty in his office to bailing him out of jail or picking him up when he was drunk Wilson had always been there.

Even after his leg Wilson had been able drag him out of his slump. When Stacy left there had been many sleepless drunken nights that he had spent with Greg on the couch – he had been to ashamed of his leg to go to bars.

And then Cameron had been gone.

There had been countless nights spent with Greg in bars. There were days when he was completely wasted to the point of passing out. There was the first week after her disappearance that a messy haired and bleary eyed House had worked the ER for every shift that he could get.

If he couldn't save Allison Cameron he could at least save someone else.

And then the funeral.

Who didn't love Allison Cameron?

At the hospital she had been the one who could cajole House into a better mood, the one who could get the tech's to speed up any tests she needed or let her slip in an MRI even though she wasn't on the list.

The nurses loved that she was polite to them and that she did clinic without complaint.

You couldn't not like the tiny, sweet, immunologist.

And growing up, she had been her town's Golden Girl.

She had been raised by her grandparents, her parents deciding that they weren't ready for children, but that they still loved each other.

They had left her and her brother Cole as they traveled the world together.

It had hurt that they weren't a part of their parents' life, and Cole had taken it harder then Allison.

The two were practically inseparable growing up, but they had drifted after going to college and getting jobs on the other sides of the country.

Cole was a writer who worked under the name 'Ace Clark'.

Ace for his childhood nickname and Clark because it was his grandmothers' maiden name.

Cameron had been the more out going of the two, but when Wilson had met the quiet twin of Cameron he could see how the two were close.

Cole had Allison's eyes and jet black hair. He was about House's height and Wilson had been shocked to find out that he only had one real arm.

The other was a prosthetic.

"Motorcycle accident. Ten years ago." Was all he would say on the subject.

Where Allison was bright and happy Cole was dark and serious. They completed each other in a way that only siblings could.

But Wilson could understand why Cameron was golden girl.

Her sunny disposition no matter what had happened to her and the way she was always willing to help someone.

They were a lot alike in that manner - Cameron and Wilson.

Always trying to help.

But the one thing that he couldn't help House with was the death of Cameron.

This was something he couldn't fix.

Wilson, the doctor that everyone loved, the one who could talk House out of problems, have dying cancer patients _thank him _– it didn't matter.

He couldn't cure death.

He couldn't fix the thing that had hit his friend the hardest.

Three days Wilson decided.

House would get three days before Wilson went after him.

* * *

"He just left Wilson. There's nothing else I can tell you. He told me that he needed some time off, a few days. It was a message though so I couldn't ask him what the hell he was doing his cell phone is off. I've been having my secretary call every half hour."

"I'm giving him three days before I start searching."

Cuddy nodded. "Three days. And I'm helping you find him."

Wilson spun to stare at her but the protest died on his lips.

"He's my friend too."

* * *

Let me know what you think.

Jess


	5. Chapter 4

So I'm back and here's the next chapter. Let me know what you think

Jess

* * *

**Chapter 4: Headaches and Confrontations**

"Is there a plan, or are you just going to introduce us?"

"I didn't tell you the while story in the letter, House."

House spun to look at the man eyes dancing in anger.

Richard barely flinched.

"Could you let me finish before you freak out? I really think that Alexis is Allison. But here's the thing, every time she starts to remember something she gets terrible tension migraines. A few have ended her back in the hospital. She has medication, but hates to take it because it makes her woozy. It's like her mind and body don't want her to remember."

"And you're telling me this now, because?"

House turned to stare the man down, but to didn't work. Richard's eyes were steady on the road.

"I'm afraid of her going into sensory overload. She's passed out before. From what I could gather, the two of you weren't extremely close, but she liked you. And as hard as you denied it, you had something for her too."

"Is it fun for you to just tear into people you don't know?"

"I thought that was your job, House." Richard smiled slightly to show that he was joking.

House was inwardly almost smirking. This guy was fun to banter with. More fun then Wilson recently, anyway.

Then again, he hadn't felt up to making fun of Wilson lately. There was nothing to make fun of when your best friend was sitting next to you making sure you weren't driving drunk and killing people.

No new material anyway. He hated Wilson's ties, he had too many wives, was a therapist, needed to stop sleeping with his dying cancer patients. The list went on but was all old material.

"I do have to hand off the torch from time to time."

Richard nodded. "True."

House paused for a minute before he started to speak again.

"Well, here's the thing. I know Allison, but you know Alexis. We're dealing with Alexis, not Allison."

"Most of Allison's personality traits are probably the same as Alexis. She lost her memory. She lost the things that helped make her Allison, but she didn't lose her instinct. She lost her name and her memory, but not her mind. Who she is is who she is."

House sighed and went back to looking out the window.

His last thought – a confession almost – was too quiet for Richard to hear.

"But, back then I don't think that I knew who she was either."

* * *

"Dr. House is currently unavailable. He'll be back eventually, but for now Dr. Foreman will be in charge of you."

"So who won?"

Wilson barely refrained from rolling his eyes at Cut-Throat Bitch.

"What do you mean?" He asked instead. Playing dumb was easy with the group he had in front of him.

"House is only going to hire two people and there are five of us. So, who won?"

"Not you." She opened her mouth to protest, but Wilson started up the stairs to leave the room already.

"Foreman, they're yours to deal with now." The 'good luck' he let out was barely audible.

Foreman nodded, but followed Wilson out the door.

"Where's House?"

"He needed to take a break."

"You know something else, though." Foreman accused, trying to stare him down.

"Greg told me that he needed time and that he would call me. His phone is off and has been off all day now."

"Where is he?"

"Look." Wilson spun to face Foreman, thoroughly irritated. "In case you haven't been here for the past few months let me fill you in. Cameron _died_."

Foreman visibly flinched at the words, but Wilson continued. Neither noticed the five team members crowded around the door watching them, as well as the nurses.

The hall was silent except for the two of them and the occasional beeping of machines in various rooms surrounding them.

"I know she died Wilson, I was at the funeral, I heard the cops."

"But you don't _get it_." Wilson persisted. "Three years they pretended there was nothing there Foreman. And maybe at first there wasn't, but Cameron was breaking down walls around House that had been up for years. And then she left, just like everyone else in his life did. But, she left in a way that wasn't controlled by anyone, but a God that House doesn't believe in. So, yeah. He needs time."

"He needs time three months after she died?"

"It took you three months to approach Chase, didn't it?"

"That's different."

"Why?"

"Because the way that Cameron and I left things was friendly. We were friendly. Chase and I weren't, and I thought it was a good idea to give him time. They were closer then we were." Foreman was trying to convince himself as well as Wilson.

"No you weren't. Allison and I were friends. Chase and Allison were friends. House had _something_ going on with her. Maybe nothing sexual or physical or anything at all, but there was something there. You were her ex-colleague. And would it have mattered if you two were friends? You quit because you didn't want to be like House, but in the end Foreman, you're worse. Because even House can have a heart. Yours – well, I wonder if it was ever there at all."

Wilson was practically shaking by the time that he was done with his little rant.

The nurses were staring in shock – very few had ever seen Wilson _angry_,and, if he was, he was usually scolding House for doing something stupid.

"Maybe House needs time. But, that doesn't make him anything but human. We all deal with grief in different ways. The first months he spent trying to drink her away. Now he's off doing something else to make her stop haunting his dreams. And you? You're here pretending you're the greatest person because you have no feelings. No feelings, no friends and this job because no one else wanted you. So get over it. Go deal with Houses' team."

With the parting shot fired Wilson walked away.

A day and some hours and he was already missing House. And starting to sound like him.

God help them all.

* * *

Chase watched the commotion in the hallway. He was standing by the nurses desk, just observing them.

Allison Cameron was gone, but not forgotten.

It would take a while – if ever – to forget her.

She wouldn't have wanted them standing there arguing about her death.

She would have wanted Chase to go out for drinks with Foreman, for them to be friends.

But that was where they differed.

After their 'microwave pizza' and 'it's Tuesday' months the two had become good friends.

One Wednesday Allison had showed up with a pizza in one hand a six pack of beer in the other.

"It's Wednesday." Chase had informed her stupidly.

"Yeah. I don't do Tuesdays." She had looked at him, eyes completely vulnerable.

"I can't have a relationship Chase. I thought that I was ready, but I'm not. As much as I deny it, I'm not over him. And I'm sorry. So, friends?"

He couldn't say no to her. So, instead he let her in.

They had pizza, and laughed. And drank. And watched stupid medical dramas.

That was there tradition. Tuesdays no longer held interest to him. Wednesdays were reserved for her.

For hanging out and having fun.

Foreman had tried to break down the walls that Chase had built up. Tried to become his friend, but it was too little to late.

He didn't want Foreman's friendship. So, instead, some days he would find himself with Wilson.

Wilson had been friends with Allison. He was her other confidant.

So now the two had their own little club. They thought that they knew Allison.

They had been wrong, but they had been right.

Chase signed off on a file and went to catch up with Wilson.

Maybe he was up for drinks.

* * *

Olivier stood next to Alexis, pool stick in hand.

The meeting that Olivier and Edward had been at had ended a little while ago and the three were now relaxing at the bar.

They weren't drinking a lot, even though it was Friday.

Alex had riding lessons to teach tomorrow, Iris had a restaurant to run – tomorrow was the day that they would eat there, as per Saturday tradition- Eddie had legal stuff to look over and Ollie had papers to grade.

The one day that the four kicked back - besides grocery shopping - and relaxed was Sunday, which was the official movie day.

Tonight was 'do-whatever-the-hell-you-wanted-but-probably-do-something together-at-the-bar' night.

If was Ollie and Alex vs. Eddie and Iris in the pool tournament that never ended.

"Ready to beat their asses?"

"Maybe."

"Only maybe?"

"We always beat their asses. It doesn't matter anymore, because they won't bet."

"Well then, I guess we have to find a way to make them bet us, don't we?"

"Like what? A _shot_ contest?"

"Yes, jello shots and wild sex. What else?"

Alexis chuckled, but grabbed the table and the room spun a little.

"Alex?" She could hear Ollie's voice as his arm rested on her shoulder in concern. But, she wasn't there anymore. She was somewhere else.

An unfamiliar voice – one only from her memories greeted her again. It was almost soothing – an old friend.

_Wow! You guys look like crap! What have you been doing all night?_

And then her own voice, familiar in sound and sarcasm, but not context.

_Jello shots and wild sex, what else?_

And just for one second she saw eyes. A brilliant bright blue, almost burning into her.

"Alex? Alex?"

And it was gone.

There was only a blinding pain.

A thousand knifes in her skull pounding away.

She fell to her knees and Ollie couldn't stop her.

Couldn't catch her in time.

Could only watch in horror as her head hit the corner of the pool table.

She whimpered at the rush of pain that once again assaulted her.

And then blissful, black silence.

All was still.

* * *

"Alex? Alex, can you hear me?" Eddies worried voice was ringing in her ears. It sounded like she was underwater.

Or in Finding Nemo when Dori was speaking whale.

"_AAAlleeexx. Caaan youuu heaaar meeee?"_

It was a struggle to get her lashes open, a struggle to meet his concerned brown eyes.

"Hey Al, you gave us quite the scare there."

"Wha?" was all that she could get out before dry mouth gave way to a cough.

She could feel something on her head, between her hair and her forehead. A bandage probably.

Instantly Eddie was there with water for her to swallow gratefully.

"You passed out on us is what. Do you remember?"

Alex nodded, but didn't voice her memory.

That would make it real. To real.

Iris stepped into the hospital room with Ollie at her side and let out a relieved sigh.

"You're awake."

"I can't believe that you took me to the hospital." She finally managed to croak out. Edie set the glass down on the nightstand next to her bed.

"It's not that far Alex, and we were worried. It's not everyday you pass out in the bar."

Eddie's voice was getting louder and Alex winced at the sound.

It hurt, God damn it. After months he should have known that loud with headaches meant more pain.

"Ed." Olivier's voice was quiet and immediately Eddie stopped and gave her a sheepish smile, lowering his voice to almost a whisper.

"Sorry sweetheart, I forgot."

"I'll forgive you if you don't call me sweetheart."

"Yes ma'am."

"Now ma'am? Iris, make him give me a real name."

Iris shook her head. And Ollie moved to sit down on Alex's other side.

"Good try Alex, but no. you're not getting out of this. Your headaches are getting worse. This one was worse then the one from last time."

"No it wasn't."

"Yes it was. You were completely unconscious on the car ride here. Scared the crap out of us. Last time you were just light headed and you vomited after taking care of Timmy. Half of that could have been a reaction to all the blood. You were up and talking. This time you fell from the pain. Knocked yourself out on the pool table. Threw up. I think that you didn't faint from hitting the table you didn't hit it that hard. You fainted from the pain. They put an IV in you. Some morphine to dull the pain. We talked to Richard and he should be here soon."

"Try now." Richard stepped into the room, a man trailing behind him.

He leaned heavily on a cane and his scruff was days old. But that wasn't what stopped her from speaking.

Blue eyes met hers.

And she was falling again as pain took over.

Falling, falling, falling.

And there was nothing to stop the silence that overtook her.

The last thing that she heard was a muffled voice, almost strangled in pain say,

'_Cameron'_

And then it was silent again.


	6. Chapter 5

**Thanks to JJhikki for betaing this

* * *

**

**Chapter 5: How It All Began  
**

Iris was standing there staring between House and Alex.

"I need to sit down" she announced before collapsing into the chair next to Eddie.

She was terrified for her friend, but _don't get in the way of the doctors_ had been drilled into her mind since she was a child.

There was nothing she wanted to do more then run over to her friend, but she knew that she would only be in the way. She also knew that her legs probably wouldn't have supported her on her way to the bed.

Richard shot a quick look at them, "Guys, get out of here. You're not doctors."

Iris shook her head, but Ollie wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "Let them do their job 'ris, you can grill them after, we'll just be getting in their way."

Iris turned, prepared to yell at Ollie when she met his eyes.

He was just as scared as she was. Alexis was someone that they had quickly come to love and adore over the past few months that they spent with her.

She had been the one to find Alexis, and those terrifying moments would forever be engrained in her mind.

_Flashback_

_It had been a long day - too long - in Iris's standards. On the third Sunday of every month she drove out to Billings and stayed for a weekend with her sister, catching up with family. She also bought some of the more important "chef things" – as Eddied called them, that she needed and couldn't get in Rudyard._

_The weekend was over and she was on her way back home._

_She was in a wooded area and allowed herself to relax and turn the radio up. These were back roads that her parents had taken when she was a child, the ones that she knew by heart._

_It was on a side road that she saw the accident happen. A small blue car was turning off the road onto a busier one. A pick-up truck blew past, slamming into the car._

_Iris was able to catch a terrified boy's face before he sped off. Iris was speeding up too, to get to the car._

_It had skidded against the road before slamming head first into a tree a few feet away. It spun once as it hit the tree and then the passenger side was smashed into another tree. Already people were stopping to help._

_Iris was already dialing nine-one-one as soon as she saw it happen._

_There was a small stream of smoke coming out from the crushed car, no sparks yet. But Iris knew soon there would be. And by the time the police got to the scene the passenger in the car would be dead._

_It had been a requirement for the residents of Rudyard to go through a number of First-Aid classes from sixth grade to senior year in high school. A safety precaution enforced in the small town to help people with everyday injuries._

_Iris knew the danger she would be in if she got near that car. But she also knew the odds of survival for the person in the car if she didn't do anything to get them out. _

_Eddie was going to kill her. But if she didn't do anything to save the person in the car her guilt would kill her first._

_With that final thought Iris was out of the car and racing towards the other one. Everyone else was standing shocked. Iris opened the driver door. The woman inside was unconscious with her head on the steering wheel. The windshield had shattered and bits of glass clung to her._

_Iris unbuckled the woman, noting with relief that she had a little time to be careful because the steam was coming from the back of the car, and she hadn't seen any flames – yet._

_That was shot to hell when she saw sparks begin to shoot up from the back. The seatbelt was unbuckled and Iris slipped a hand to support the woman's neck before dragging her halfway out of the car. A man appeared suddenly and scooped the woman up._

_Iris let him carry her up the hill, his long legs moving faster than she would have been able to._

_As they stepped onto the safe side of the road the exploded into flames._

_Minutes after that an ambulance came screaming around a corner, lights flashing. _

_After she was placed on a support board, one of the paramedics turned to them._

"_Are either of you coming with her?"_

"_I will."_

_The man nodded his head._

"_I'll meet you at the hospital. Where are you taking her?"_

"_St. Vincent's."_

Iris had called Eddie and Ollie and told them to be there as fast as they could.

She started crying as soon as she was wrapped safely in Eddie's arms. Ollie had already hugged her and checked her for injuries with his eyes.

"It was terrible. And no one knows who she is. Her car is demolished; they couldn't get _anything_from it. Not the license plate even."

The man who had helped her get the woman from the car – Mike – had left a little while ago to go home to his wife and kids.

"What did the doctors say?"

"She has a broken arm, three cracked ribs, various bumps and bruises and cuts from the glass and a stage five concussion – they think. She's still out of it, but they told me that I should expect her to be disoriented and confused when she wakes up."

"Iris, how long do you think that you're staying here?" Eddie's voice was resigned. When she had called him he had known that she had found someone else that needed saving, someone that she wouldn't be able to let go of.

"No one knows who she is, I'm staying until we know who her family is. She has no one right now."

"I'll go book a hotel for us." Ollie replied softly.

So the three of them had stayed, keeping vigil over a woman they didn't know, a perfect stranger.

When she had finally woken up after three days it had been in the middle of the night. She was alone and terrified, but a nurse had called them.

"Your girl is awake."

They had taken to calling her Alexis, as Iris hated the term '_Jane Doe_'.

Someone would come and claim her, or she would wake up and be able to go home.

They hadn't expected the amnesia, the fear in the woman's eyes.

Twenty minutes after the exhausted group of three had arrived the nurses had had to sedate her.

_We can't just leave her here._ Iris had paced in the waiting room, tears streaming down her face.

And that was how it happened. One week later Alexis Peters had sat in a car for five hours with three complete strangers and had started a new life.

At first the doctors had been hesitant to let them take the Jane Doe home, but after background checks, and talks with both Alexis and Iris, Eddie and Ollie they had agreed - albeit reluctantly.

So, on the third Sunday of every month Iris would bring Alexis with her on her trip and they would stop at the hospital and run tests. Nothing had come up so far, and while the hospital looked to see if anyone knew her they didn't look very hard.

Sixty miles away from Billings at Big Horn County Memorial Hospital a doctor would sometimes wonder what had happened to his young immunologist, until he learned of her death via telephone and Dr. Cuddy. After that he stopped wondering.

Richard and the man with the blue eyes had both rushed over to Alexis and were still checking her vitals as a nurse scurried into the room.

"What happened?"

"What do you _think_ happened?" Eddie spat. "She had another migraine and it caused her to pass out. Why the hell is the pain so bad? It's never been this bad before."

No one answered him.

"Does she get them often?" House was still examining her.

"Often enough for the pain meds to be refilled once and a while, but not often enough for Alex to end up in the hospital a lot. This one and the one before caused her to pass out. The other one though, she hit the pool table before I could catch her. But, the doctors don't know us."

"They should." The murmur was angry and only caught by Iris and Richard. She shot Richard a questioning look. He shook his head and turned to House.

"I prescribed her 10 mg of oxycodone when the headaches started."

"I want an MRI."

"She's already had about a million of those. What do you think you're going to find?" Eddie was watching the new man.

"Absolutely nothing. She probably has a mild concussion mixed with pain from memories. Her brain is just sending her body signals." House pulled away and turned to face him, eyes serious. "But in Med school they always taught us to be safe, than sorry. Sorry doesn't help."

Richard shook his head. Eddie was protective of Alex – especially because she didn't remember who she was. He was protective of his friends in general, they were his family and he would do anything for them.

"Eddie, be nice. This is Dr. House. He's the man I contacted about Alexis."

House had avoided looking at her face.

The moment her eyes had flutter closed in pain he had pretended that it wasn't Allison Cameron - Alexis Peters – whoever she was - staring at him in shock. He had pretended that she was just another patient. Another face in the crowd that he had to treat. He hadn't been sure until her eyes had met his. But now he took a moment to look at her face.

Even with the patch on her forehead she was beautiful. Even when she had no idea who she was. She was his. And that was all that mattered.

Blonde hair was in layers around her face, the longest layer just hitting her shoulder and the highest layer brushing her cheeks. He lifted his hand and brushed it away from her face.

The cold, hard relief that was running through him almost made him giddy.

She was alive. She was there. He hadn't believed that she was dead, and he was right. If it weren't for the cane he would have been dancing.

Normal people would have had a bigger reaction on the outside, would have been screaming, crying, laughing, anything really - but he wasn't a normal person. He was Gregory House, and would continue to be the way he was until the day he died.

He leaned heavily on his cane and sighed.

There was a small part of him though, whispering in his ear. _She has no idea who you are. Who she is. If she does remember, when will that be and who's to say that she'll want you._

House shook his head to clear his thoughts. He would cross that bridge when he came to it.

Right now all he wanted to do was take her in his arms. Hug her. Never let her go. Maybe even get emotional.

The man Richard called Eddie was staring at him though and it was unnerving.

"You're_the_ Dr. House?"

"I am." He was all out of sarcastic retorts for the day. For the week maybe even.

Cameron was _alive_. That was all that mattered.

Richard interrupted to look at Eddie. "How do you know who he is?"

"I looked into people who might be able to find out who Alex was, doctors, specialists and stuff. His name popped up a few times in my searches."

House nodded, impressed with Eddie's desire to help out his friend.

"Her name is Allison Cameron. She's thirty three years old and she used to be an immunologist on my diagnostic team at Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital in New Jersey."

"Allison." Iris slipped over to the bed and stared at Alexis-who-was-really-Allison.

"What does it mean?"

"What does it mean?" House repeated, confused.

"Alex – Allison has an – well, I guess you could call it obsession with names and meanings. She didn't even know her name when we found her, so she loves finding the meanings of names."

Eddie interrupted. "Richard's name is powerful leader. He's the only doctor in town, the one who leads us through everyone's medical crisis. Iris's name is colorful and rainbow. It goes on."

"It means noble, truth."

Iris nodded, but did not ask anymore questions on the name, instead choosing to slip into the chair next to the bed, slipping her hand into Alexis'

Richard disappeared to talk to the nurses' about getting a MRI. He worked at the hospital three out of the five days of the week and spent the other two in Rudyard taking care of the people there.

House sat down on the other side of Cameron, his hands on his cane. He popped a Vicodin and looked around the room before focusing his eyes back on Cameron.

"What happened?" Iris asked softly.

Any thoughts of getting the three of them out of the room were forgotten. This was more important.

She could see it in his eyes. There was a story behind Alexis – Allison's disappearance. And probably not a very happy one.

She wondered if there had been a love affair. The look on his face when he had confirmed it was in fact his missing subordinate had been more then a boss's joy.

"I had three fellows working for me. We solved medical mysteries. Three months ago one quit, the other was fired and Cameron resigned. I convinced the other two to come back and work for me, as attending physicians this time, which basically meant that they got a better parking space and more money, and maybe a bigger office. She refused. We fought about it and then she left. Two days later when some of her friends hadn't heard from her yet, and neither had her family they filed a missing persons report."

House sighed and rubbed his forehead.

There was nothing more that he wanted then to have Allison – Alexis – whatever she wanted to go by - wake up and have everything go back to normal. Maybe a little different. He would tell her that he liked her and keep her away from the wombat. Tell her that he really did like her. Make sure that she never left again.

"She didn't want to be found by us. Gave three different people three different states that she was going to work in. They found an incinerated car, not enough bone to do a DNA test and blonde hair. It would have taken Cameron two days with no sleep or stops to get from New Jersey to Montana. The car that the cops found was in Wyoming. The car that was there was complete incinerated, they couldn't even get a license plate or model number. All they knew was that it was blue. Which was the color of her car. They said it was her, and closed the case."

"But you didn't believe it was her." Iris was watching him with wide eyes.

"No. First off, she wouldn't have been in Wyoming. It's not on the way and she doesn't have any family and friends that live there."

Relief and the high that House had felt was quickly fading and exhaustions was setting in. He didn't want to leave though.

The last thing that he wanted to do was let Cameron out of his sight for one minute.

There were people that he had to call to let them know, things that he had to do, but his first concern was Cameron.

The man that had not been introduced to him was watching him with murky blue eyes.

"Richard, when can we take Ale- Allison home?"

His voice was quiet, but firm.

"Soon. After her MRI. She should be waking up soon. Which is why all of you need to get out of here, too many people might shock her again."

"But-"

"Iris, you can stay but Ollie, Eddie, and House need to leave."

Eddie and Ollie stood reluctantly but House remained seated.

"I don't want her to go into shock again if she sees you House. Can one of you-" Richard turned his attention to Ollie and Eddie "Show House where the MRI is? No one else had it booked now, so we're going immediately."

* * *

House watched the images of Cameron's brain on the screen.

Just as he had suspected there was nothing there. But, the other part of him was insanely relived. The part of him that wasn't always a doctor, the part he tried so hard to hide. The part that made him human.

Richard stood next to House and stared at the screen as well.

Richard pressed the proper buttons that would take Cameron out of the MRI machine and sighed.

"So, nothings wrong with her brain."

"But-?" House trailed off waiting for the 'bad news' statement.

"But last time she saw you the memories were so intense that she passed out."

House finished the thought with a un-House like sigh. "So how do we get her to remember without causing her excruciating amounts of pain?"


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6: Photos and Waiting**

When she woke up the first thing she noticed was Iris curled up in a chair watching her.

The second thing that she noticed was the pounding in her head had lessened.

"Ris?"

Iris bolted upright and turned to face Alex, her eyes lighting up in relief.

"You scared us sweetie. How're you feeling?"

"Okay." She accepted the water her friend held out.

"Where are Eddie and Ollie?" She scanned the room and turned to Iris expectantly.

Iris paused. They hadn't discussed how they were going to tell Alexis she was in fact Allison Cameron, or anything along the lines of who she really was.

"We're right here Al."

Eddie poked his head around the door before stepping into the room fully, Ollie only half a step behind him.

In Ollie's hand was a newspaper and Iris eyed it in confusion.

As he came closer she realized that it wasn't a newspaper, but it was an old copy of JAMA, which she recognized immediately since Richard always had a few scattered around.

Richard stepped into the room and walked over to Alexis, checking her vitals.

"You seem to be doing fine, Allison."

"Allison?" She eyed him carefully, expression serious, eyes thoughtful.

Her life over the past few months hadn't been without bumps and bruises, and she was cautious.

"Yes. Allison. Allison Cameron."

She showed no reaction to her full name, and Richard wasn't sure if he had expected there to be or not. After all was said and done, it was just a name.

Growing up she had been called Allie, and when she started working all of her co-workers had called her Cam or Cameron.

Richard rubbed his forehead and resisted the urge to sigh.

The whole notion of Amnesia hadn't fully been researched. Each amnesia case was different, due to the complexity of the human brain.

Many cases of Amnesia had been documented, as a result of memory suppression after the initial concussion had been worn off, but this whole idea was still fairly new to him. Research could only get them so far.

A few specialists had been called in, but besides conducting the standard tests, they were really not much help.

In order to get more information they would need all of her medical information.

They had some, but not enough to determine the actual cause of her amnesia. Whether it was just due to her concussion or if there was a more in depth psychological issue.

Certain words and phrases had caused her to have some mild migraines, but the memory or sight of people from her past had caused her enough pain to pass out.

"What does it mean?"

"Allison?" Iris asked tentatively. No one had been sure about the reaction she would have to learning her new – well, old really, identity.

"Yeah. My name. What does it mean?" she shot back without missing a beat.

Iris grinned. "Let me tell you -"

* * *

House sat in the cafeteria and stared at his phone.

He had been wondering if he should call Wilson and tell him the news. Or just call Wilson in general. He needed to hear a familiar voice – not that he would ever admit it.

Seeing Cameron had scared him far more then he would like to admit. She had stared at him with her wide doe-eyes for a split second and then all had fallen apart again.

Richard had asked for Cameron – Allison – Alexis - he didn't know what to call her anymore – but, he had asked for her medical history.

He was currently spinning his cane around in circles. The group that had become Cameron's family was talking to her, and he was down here.

Waiting.

This was why he hated being on the other side. He had been once or twice when he was a child, and then again with his leg.

When you were a doctor you were in control, but when you were a patient or family all you could do was stand on the sidelines and watch the world pass by.

And here he was once again watching the world pass by.

His mother had been very sick once when he was about thirteen. So sick with pneumonia that they weren't sure she was going to make it.

She had pulled through, but the week and a half she spent in ICU was terrifying.

House had had a fit in the middle of the waiting room – demanding that the doctor tell him what was going on. He _needed_ to know that his mother would be all right.

The doctor hadn't been able to tell him much and his father had made him go back home that night. Once there he had gotten the harshest beating from his father that he could ever recall.

Greg had embarrassed his father in front of some strangers and the doctor, and John House believed his son should always keep a military-esque calm.

An ice bath was followed by a whipping. He still had some of the lash scars from that night on his back. After that he had been sent to sleep outside. They were at a new base camp, and he hadn't had time to sneak out his usual necessities.

The January air had given him pneumonia as well and the following night he had ended up in a hospital bed next to his mother.

The feeling that he remembered most – beside the deep hate he felt when he saw the satisfaction in his father's eyes was helplessness.

There was nothing he could do to help his mother who was struggling to breathe or to help himself.

When House had gotten out of the hospital, his mother a few days ahead of him, he had found what he wanted to be: A doctor.

When he was a doctor he wouldn't be helpless, on the other side, always waiting for answers.

Yet here he was again, waiting.

* * *

"House." Cuddy answered her cell phone, relief evident in her voice.

"I need Cameron's medical records."

"House-"

"I would get them myself but I'm not in New Jersey. I need that STAT."

"Why?"

There was a sigh and then some shuffling movements.

"If I tell you will you leave it alone?"

"For now."

"She's alive." Cuddy stared at the phone.

"House, if this is all some sick joke-"

"Do you think that I would make this into a joke Lisa?" His voice was getting louder and Cuddy sighed.

"No. But, Greg-"

"She's alive. I need her medical records. I'll explain later, okay?"

"Give me the information."

Cuddy wrote down the fax number he read to her and sighed.

"You'll get them within a few minutes. Call me later. I want to hear the full story."

"Okay." There was a pause. "Lis?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

* * *

"These are your co-workers Al."

Cameron stared at the faces in JAMA. She willed herself to remember something – anything.

"No."

Foreman's unsmiling face stared back at her, the one to the farthest left. She moved her gaze to the next person and squinted.

The woman standing there should have been familiar, should have done something to her, but all she drew was a blank.

The man standing behind her pulled at her brain for a second. There was a flicker – a voice.

"_It's not your job to be her friend. Do you understand? And it's not worth it. She feels better her few final days and you're not the same, maybe for years."_

"_You don't think it's worth it?"_

"Al? Al?"

She shook her head and turned to Iris. The morphine that had been pumped into Cameron earlier prevented her from the pounding pain. Instead it was a dull pulse.

"I don't know his name." She whispered. "But we had an argument about sick people once."

Ollie wasn't sure what she meant, but he nodded.

"What about him?" Iris leaned over and touched a finger to Chase. "He's cute."

"_It's not Tuesday." A strong Australian accented voice pointed out._

"_I didn't do Tuesdays Rob. Wednesday's are friends night though, how's that sound?"_

"His name is Rob."

Her voice was quiet, distant. She was lost. Off in another place.

"And him?" Eddie pointed to the final person, beside herself in the picture.

And that was too much for Cameron. The words were flying fast and furious into her head.

"_Do you like monster trucks?"_

"_No, I hired you because you look good; it's like having a nice piece of art in the lobby."_

"_You live under the delusion that you can fix everything that isn't perfect. That's why you married a man who was dying of cancer. You don't love, you need, and now that your husband is dead, you're looking for your new charity case, that's why you're going out with me. I'm twice your age, I'm not great looking, I'm not charming, I'm not even nice. What I am is what you need…I'm damaged."_

There was a face finally, a man with a suit on, blue eyes hard, face angry.

It was at that moment the same man peaked his head around the door, making eye contact with Richard, holding papers in one hand, a cane in the other.

"Get out!" Alex gripped the blanket eyes blinded almost completely by tears. "Get out, get out, get out!"

Immediately Richard was at her side, trying to get her to calm down, but she couldn't. Her breathing was erratic, the machines she was attached to beeping wildly as her heart rate went through the roof.

She felt the prick of something on her skin, and then it was all gone.

Again.

* * *

Wilson sat with Chase in a bar, his hands gripping the mug of beer in front of him.

"So-" Chase said slowly. "He's somewhere in Montana. You don't know where, and you only think that you know why."

"I think that he wants to get over losing Allison. I don't know why he chose Montana."

"Unless-" He paused and shook his head "Never mind."

"What?" Wilson asked.

"He didn't believe she was dead."

"Rob-" Wilson began warningly.

"She was going to Montana. Billings, right? I know that it's crazy. The chances of it are practically impossible, but still." Chase shrugged. "I used to work for House, remember? It's all about expecting the unexpected."

Wilson sighed. "It's a terrible thing to say Rob, but I almost wish that they had found her body. Just so we knew if she was dead or alive."

"But that would be to easy. And you know that with us nothing is ever easy."

"I'll drink to that." Both lifted their glasses.

"So, what? Two more days until you start searching for him?"

"Yeah. And until then-"

Rob finished the thought. It was something that they had started repeating. "- all we can do is wait."

* * *

**Quotes from Acceptance, Sports Metaphors, Pilot, Love Hurts**


	8. Chapter 7

A second chapter because the last time took so long. Thanks to JJhikki for her amazing betaing abilities.

Jess

* * *

**Chapter 7: Home Again**

Allison Cameron once again woke up in her hospital bed, but this time there was only grogginess, no headache to be found.

She knew what had happened. The flashes of the conversations that had flashed through her head without causing a single pain.

The physical pain was gone for the most part, but it was replaced by something far worse. All of the emotions that went with the memories.

At least this was a small relief. Without the physical pain, her mind was clear and she could try and focus on her past memories. She could try and figure out what was going on.

* * *

Eric Foreman sat in House's office, staring out the window into the bright morning sunlight. He held the red/grey ball in his hands.

He was missing _something_. The case was difficult and he felt like the answer was just out of his reach. Everything wasn't adding up and the team wasn't allowed to leave until he figured it out.

They had already been there for almost twenty-four hours. Everybody was exhausted./ there was a commotion coming from down the hall and Foreman turned to look out the window.

Cuddy was racing to Wilson's office, her face pale. Chase was trailing a few steps behind with a confused look on his face.

Curious Foreman got up to follow them.

"James!"

"What's wrong Lisa? Rob?"

Wilson looked up from his papers and stared at the two. Robert shrugged.

"She came into the surgery wing this morning and told me to come with her. So I did. And now we're here."

"I talked to House last night."

Both turned their gazes to her.

"He called me-" Cuddy exhaled. It was harder then she thought. "He wanted – Allison's medical records. He said that she's alive."

There was dead silence in Wilson's office and a soft _thud_from the outside as Foreman let the red/grey ball drop from his hands.

* * *

_Two days later_

"Anyone else find this a little weird?"

Ollie snorted. "Why? Because it's like déjà vu all over again?"

"No, because I think that I like your car, that's why it's weird."

"Always thought that you were an odd one." Eddie put in, turning ever so slightly in his seat to grin at Iris and Allison who sat in the backseat.

"No, seriously." Allison rolled her eyes.

"I mean about three months ago I was in a car with three random strangers to some small town in Montana that I'd never heard of, having no idea who I was. And now, here I am driving back to the same small town in Montana with you three, Richard and some guy that apparently causes me very intense pain from memories that I don't recall at all. I thought I knew who I am, but at the same time I don't. He told me I'm Allison" her hand jerked to point at House in the car behind them, "but all I can remember is Alexis."

"You do realize that after all this you're going to need intense years of therapy, right?" Iris questioned.

"Ha. After living with you three I already need years of therapy."

"I love you too Allie."

"Just shut up and drive Ollie."

* * *

"I can't believe I'm doing this."

"What?"

"I'm going to some small town in Montana to help my co-worker regain her memory. Said co-worker can barely look at me."

"Which is why we're taking this slowly."

"Snails move faster then we do."

"Unless you want to call someone else in to help Allison, you're stuck."

"No. I'm not bringing anyone else in."

"Why not?" Richard was genuinely curious.

"It's a long story. But to make a long story short, one of her co-workers stole an article she wrote, the other one she had no-strings attached sex with a few times, and she doesn't know our boss well enough for her to help."

Richard stared at him before pursing his lips and nodding. "Well, what about the other person in the photo? The last guy."

"Wilson?" House sighed. "I thought about it, believe me. But there are some problems with even brining him in. He'd try to psychoanalyze me, and then her, and then our interactions."

Richard remained silent, waiting House out.

"Cameron had a thing for me."

"If you're here to help her realize who she is I think that you can call her by her first name." Richard said calmly. It gave House the courage to continue.

"She had a – I don't even know what you would call it. She told me she liked me, and I told her I hired her as lobby art. I took her to see monster trucks and when she quit the first time, in order to get her to come back to work she forced me to take her on a date which I unintentionally sabotaged." House ran a hand over his scruffy chin.

"So between the two of you, you have quiet the screwed up relationship."

"Yeah, pretty much."

"Yet, you're the one who didn't believe she was dead, the one who went on a date to get her back, the one who's out here right now."

"Your point?"

"I'd say it's more then the little lady who had a 'thing'." House resisted banging his head into the window.

"And you know what the worst part of that is?" The smile that House wore was a bitter one. "All she can remember about me is the fact that I caused her great amounts of pain. I avoided my feelings - or whatever they are - for her until she was gone. And now I've found her but I don't know if I can even get her back."

"Ya know what?" Richard kept his eyes in the road, his driving steady.

"What?"

"After all this is over the two of you should write a book."

House snorted. "Because that will be the first thing on my list of things to do."

* * *

Allison stepped out of the car and stared at the place that had been her house for the last few months.

"So, I'm starving. Hospital food sucks. Who's up for pizza?"

"I am. Large pizza with extra cheese, half bacon and mushroom half jalapeños and sausage all pepperoni?" Iris rattled off from memory.

"Exactly." Eddie replied.

"I'll call now. Al, you go in and sit on the couch. I don't care if you say you're fine you were in the hospital for almost a week; go sit your ass down and rest."

"Yes'um." Allison saluted and slipped into the house, using her key to unlock the front door.

Minutes later House and Richard pulled into the driveway.

"So, we're really doing this?"

"I can't think of any other way." Richard ran a hand through his hair and sighed. "This is difficult."

"Life is difficult" Ollie pointed out.

"Thank you Captain Obvious."

Iris stood in the doorway holding a phone. "I realized that I don't know what you two eat on your pizza. We usually get a large pizza with extra cheese, half bacon and mushroom half jalapeños and sausage all pepperoni."

Richard shrugged. "Fine by me."

They both turned to House who nodded his head. "Throw in some beer and you got yourself a deal."

Eddie grinned. "We're more of scotch drinkers, but -"

"Scotch works."

* * *

Allison lay on the couch her eyes closed.

"Al?" She felt the couch shift and Eddie's cold hand on her forehead.

"You okay sweetheart?"

"I'm scared." It was a half whispered confession, voice low and trembling.

"I know kiddo."

"The -" She paused and swallowed. "This man, this Dr. House. If I have all these bad memories of him why does he want to help me, why do I feel like I trust him?"

"Can I let you in on a secret?"

"Will it make me feel better?"

"I hope so."

She nodded. "Shoot."

"He's been searching for you all this time. He hasn't given up on you, and even though you can't look at him he's determined to bring you back to Allison Cameron."

"And this is supposed to make me feel better how? What if I can't go back to her? What if I never remember? What-"

Eddie stopped her, pulling her into a hug. "Don't you get it kiddo? He loves you."

* * *

House stepped into the house and looked around. The kitchen was immediately off the foyer to the left, and there was a hallway that went straight and also branched off to the right.

Ollie pointed straight ahead.

"Back there is the dining room loving room area. To your right is the den and the stairs. Allie is in the den."

House nodded and started to go straight. Richard caught him by the arm.

"I want to try something. Follow me."

House stared at him. "What do you want to do?"

"Just trust me."

"I don't want to hurt her." House looked almost angry to have to make the confession. "If she has to stay Alexis Peterson for the rest of her life – I don't want to hurt her."

Richard nodded but still pulled House towards the den.

"No matter what we do Dr. House it's going to cause pain. The only thing that we can do is try to make it hurt less. That's what doctors do after all. They try to fix things."

* * *

Allison hugged Eddie until she heard someone clear their throat softly.

She turned to meet Richard's eyes.

"Hey Rich."

"Hey Al. I want to try something, is that okay?"

Allison shrugged. "Yeah, I guess."

Richard sat next to her, and Eddie walked out of the room. House was standing there watching Richard. He was standing in such a way that Allison couldn't see him but Richard could.

"What are you two doing?"

"Richard wanted to try something. I'm just a piece of the puzzle. I don't know."

Eddie nodded, studying House for a minute. "I don't care who you are. If you hurt her I am not above breaking you in half."

House nodded. "I don't plan on hurting her. And if I do you'll have to get in line behind the other people who will want to kill me – including myself."

Eddie nodded. "Welcome to Rudyard Dr. House."

"It's Greg."

"Then call me Eddie."

* * *

"What do you want me to do Rich?"

"This may hurt a little bit, okay?"

"Great."

"I want you to think about Dr. House."

"Okay…"

"You used to work for him. Five years before you started working for him he had an infraction in his right thigh. The muscle death caused the limp. It's permanent now." Richard continued on describing the relationship that House and Cameron had gone through, all of the stuff that he had gotten from House early. "- The two of you had some form of a 'thing'."

Allison's eyes shot open and she stared at him – cheeks coloring.

"Not like that." Richard also blushed. "You liked each other and he wouldn't admit it, and you gave up after a while."

"Why are you telling me all of this?"

"If you know it, it can't be a surprise right? You wouldn't be attacked by memories."

It was so simple that it had been overlooked.

"Maybe not." Allison's eyes brightened at the thought.

"House?"

He stepped around the corner and into the room, his cane hitting the ground heavily.

This time when he looked at Allison Cameron a smile slipped over his face. There she was staring right back at him, eyes as wide as saucers.


	9. Chapter 8

Here's the next chapter. Thanks to my beta jjhikki. Happy New Year.

Jess

* * *

**Chapter 8: They Meet**

Neither noticed that Richard had slipped out of the room, their gazes locked on each other.

"Hello Dr. House." She dropped her gaze shyly to the floor and House smiled for the first time in a long time. Maybe everything would start looking up.

"Call me Greg." It was easier that way he had reasoned with himself earlier. She had never called him Greg – with his first name maybe there would be less painful memories.

It wasn't because he had always liked the thought of her calling him by his first name. Nope. That wasn't the reason at all.

"Okay. You can call me-" she paused and shrugged.

"I guess you can call me Allison, or Allie. Or Cameron. Whatever you used to call me."

"I'll call you Allison." It was only logical. If she was going to call him Greg he might as well call her Allison.

She shrugged and curled her feet onto the couch.

"Okay." House sat down next to her and the room was filled with uncomfortable silence.

He had no idea what to say. Here he was sitting with his duckling – well, she wasn't his duckling anymore but that didn't matter – all he wanted to do was make sure she wasn't a figment of his imagination. He wanted to hug her, kiss her senseless, make her promise to never leave his sight again. At the same time he didn't want to scare her. He was a stranger and she had no idea who he was, let alone who she was.

Allison wished that House – Greg – whatever she was supposed to call him would say something. She didn't know what to say, and she knew that he probably didn't either, but that didn't help her nerves. All of her memories about the man in front of her were not good ones. They continued to sit there, both staring off into the distance, lost in thoughts and silences.

"Guys the food is -" Iris walked in and paused staring at the two of them. "Okay, so who lives in the land of awkward silences?"

"We always have." House replied. He stood up with some difficulty and then offered his hand to Cameron.

She took it and then almost immediately let it go, falling back onto the couch, holding her head in her hands.

"_Because I want you to come back"_

"_Not good enough"_

"_Want more money? A car allowance, better parking space?"_

"_Dinner. And not just a meal between two colleagues. A date."_

"_You'll come back if I go on a date with you?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Okay, it's a deal." (They shake hands)_

"Allison? Allison?" House began to check her pulse and continued to try to get her attention.

"You went on a date with me?" Cameron seemed confused and House stepped back to look at her. There was a look of pain on her face, but she seemed more concerned about the question then the dull pounding.

House glanced at Iris who took her cue and slipped out of the room.

"I did."

"Why?"

"What?"

"The only way I would go back to work was a date, why didn't you say 'screw you'?"

"Why, you would have?"

"Yes." Allison replied confidently. "I would have said 'Cat's chance in hell.'"

"But you're not me."

"So why did you say yes?"

"Because I wanted you to come back, because you're not lobby art, you're brilliant. And because when you asked me if I liked you I lied."

"What does that mean?"

House almost cursed himself for brining up more memories.

"You'll remember eventually."

Allison kicked her feet against the couch in a childish act of frustration. "When? I don't even know who I am. Who you are."

House crouched so that they were eye level and tilted his head to the side ever so slightly. To an outsider it would look as if he were about to kiss her. But, as reality was, he was just invading her personal space.

"You're Allison Cameron. _Doctor_ Allison Cameron. You have a degree in immunology and work at Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital with me and two other people who are your teammates. We solve diagnostic mysteries. You have one brother and grew up somewhere in Montana. You care too much, love too hard and are too naïve for your own good. You're caring, and kind to the point where you could give other people cavities. You're polite and always there to help the patients. You have insane faith in them. You don't give up and are one of the most stubborn people I've ever met, and everyone loves you."

Cameron tilted her head. "What about you?"

"What?"

"Describe yourself."

"Didn't Richard already do that?" House questioned. He had stood in the doorway and listened to some of his life story being spilled out.

"Nope. He described what he knew. You're describing yourself and that's what I want to hear. There's a difference."

House shook his head. "Dr. Gregory House, head of the diagnostic medicine department, a double specialty in infectious diseases and nephrology. Only child, army brat raised everywhere. I'm the sarcastic ass of the hospital. I don't care enough and people have compared my heart to that of the Grinch's before his grew. Everybody lies, especially the patients. You cure them because you want to help people; I cure them because they're a challenge. I'm stubborn, and my only friend is Wilson. Everyone hates me."

Cameron looked at him. He waited for her to say something, anything. But instead she smiled at him.

"Thank you."

"For what?" House asked, confused.

"You didn't want to do that but you did. Now come on, pizzas here and I'm hungry." She stood up and slipped her hand into his, pulling him towards the kitchen.

House smiled. It wasn't much, but it was a start.

* * *

"What do you mean she's alive?" Chase demanded. He had sunk into a chair in Wilson's office and was a deathly white.

"I don't know. He was supposed to call me back, but he hasn't yet."

Foreman stepped into the office and Chase regarded him warily.

"What do you want?"

"Was I not going to be invited to the pow-wow?"

"No." Chase stood. "Why would you? You didn't care about her. You don't care about her. You just like being informed so you can play wounded."

Foreman's eyes flashed. "That's not true."

"Isn't it? You didn't care about her when she was alive and worked here. You pretended you cared for all the months she's been gone, but I bet you the moment she comes back everything will go back to normal." Chase spat.

Foreman froze. It was said in spite, but that didn't mean it wasn't true. There was no way he could defend himself against that. So he did what House would have done. That is, if the missing person hadn't been Cameron.

"What makes you think she's coming back?"

He barely even felt Chases' fist.

* * *

House watched as the Iris, Ollie, and Eddie passed around food and joked, making sure everyone was comfortable. Allison was quiet, but the three didn't bother her about it – much.

From time to time Iris would send her a concerned glance, but then Allison would shake her head and smile ever so slightly.

Ollie would do the same, only he would stare at her until she looked back and make a funny face, causing her to laugh and reciprocate with a face right back.

Eddie was the least obvious. His hand dangled loosely over the back of Allison's chair, and from time to time his hand would ever so carefully brush against her shoulder. It was nothing big, a simple, 'I'm here if you need me' type of gesture.

All Allison wanted to do was talk to Greg again.

* * *

"So, is this still awkward?"

Allison let out a little laugh. "Possibly. But, I mean, how much worse can it get?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I met you what – a few days ago? And you're a stranger who says that you used to be my boss. And when I met you I had terrible painful flashbacks that consisted of you being an ass."

House opened his mouth, but she caught his eye. "I'm not done yet. So now, here I am taking said boss that I don't remember up to my bedroom, because we're sharing a room since neither of us are up to crashing on the couch and we're not making anyone else. Can it get more awkward?"

_If I pin you against the wall and kiss you senseless. _House thought it, but didn't let the words escape his lips. That might freak her out beyond repair.

"There are always ways."

"Eh. My life is full of them. Up until about three days ago I had no idea who I was, what I was doing or anything along those lines. Now I have you telling me who I am, but I still have no idea. Anything you say can only get me so far."

She paused and opened the door to her room, nearly hitting the wall with the force of her push. "If I could remember-"

"Hey." House put his hand on her arm. "As of today you can look me in the face. That's a big improvement from yesterday where you were telling me to get out of your room."

"But it's not _enough_."

"It will happen eventually. Just take it one day at a time." If she couldn't be calm and reassuring then he would have to take over her job. Only for Cameron though.

Allison nodded. "One foot in front of the other, right?"

"Exactly." House nodded.

"If you're going to stick with me everywhere does that mean you're coming to horseback riding with me tomorrow?"

Indeed, they had already discussed with Richard that House would shadow her and see if he could get her to remember some things on her own – like her teammate's names or her favorite color.

"Yeah, I guess that means I am."

Cameron grinned. "Cool. Have you ever gone riding before?"

One look at his face confirmed her answer. "I guess you're going to learn.'

* * *

"I think that I like him."

Iris stood next to Ollie as they washed and dried the dishes. Richard and Eddie were talking, and the two were content with what they were doing.

"Is it the abrasiveness or the snark that reminds you of your dear Edward?"

Iris threw splashed some water at Ollie and he responded by snapping the dishtowel at her.

"No. it was interesting at dinner. Did you notice the way he kept his eyes on her, but wasn't overbearing because she was quiet?"

"Yeah, so?"

"If the way Al acts is how she would normally act, with some snark, but mostly quiet, shy, politeness and House acts with his usual sarcasm and snark that Rich was telling us about then I can see the two of them fitting well together."

"At work? Yeah, they probably make a good team."

"You know exactly what I mean Ollie, don't play smart-ass with me."

He shrugged. "Sorry, it was too easy." He slipped back into normal Ollie mode. "They work because you and Eddie work. You balance each other out. One's ying the others yang and it's all good."

"Or something like that."

Ollie nodded. "Or something like that. Fact of the matter is the two of them are getting a second chance at whatever they had the first time and they better not screw it up."

Iris snorted. "Because us threatening them to figure their problems out would be so helpful."

"I don't know about you, I'm just here for the food." Iris sighed and splashed him again with water. Some things never changed.

* * *

"We have a few options." Cuddy began.

"Hide his body?" Wilson suggested.

"I like it." Chase replied.

Foreman had been unconscious for a little while, but he would be fine. Chase's punch hadn't done any damage; the mild sedative after he his head hit the ground had knocked him out.

"I was talking about with House."

"Okay, carry on then." Wilson waved a hand at her and Cuddy shook her head. She should have been more frustrated with the two men sitting in front of her, but she couldn't be. They were just trying to relieve the tense atmosphere that had been surrounding their small group like a cloud of smoke.

"We can stay here and do nothi-"

"No." The response from Chase and Wilson was instantaneous,

"We could stay here and just call House until we get answers and go from there."

She paused. This was the idea that she wanted to go with the idea that would make every one of them happy. But at the same time it could cause them some amount of pain.

"Or?" Wilson prompted.

"Or we can go to Montana."

* * *

Quote is from Kids  



	10. Chapter 9

Thanks to jjhikki for beating. So here's the deal. My finals are coming up soon, so the probability of me writing more then one chapter in the next two weeks is slim. Because of that I'm giving you this next chapter. Just so no one thinks I've forgotten about this fic, but school comes first.

Jess

* * *

**Chapter 9: A Breakthrough and Plane Rides**

Cameron awoke at her usual time – seven – the next morning and slipped out of her bed, quickly finding slippers to warm her cold feet as they hit the hardwood.

She crept down the stairs and got out five travel coffee mugs, the ones that Eddie had bought from Bed, Bath and Beyond after Iris had broken the last set.

Cameron quickly set the coffee maker up, going through motions that she had long since memorized.

Footsteps startled her. She usually had a half hour to herself before a grumpy Eddie came in and grabbed his coffee. He would give her a muted smile of thanks, a kiss on the cheek and then disappear to get dressed.

"Good morning." His voice didn't startle her, but the happiness she felt at hearing it did.

"Good morning Greg. Coffee's almost ready."

"Thanks."

"I have a lesson at one thirty, and then a few more after school lets out at three thirty, but my morning is free so we're going riding. We'll probably meet Iris for lunch."

"And how exactly do you expect me to go riding?" He gestured to his leg and Cameron stared at him for a few seconds before blinking slowly.

"I've seen people ride that never thought they would. Don't worry about it."

She filled the five mugs with coffee and went about adding ingredients to make them perfect. Milk for Eddie, sugar and crème for Iris, crème for Ollie, sugar for Greg, and black for herself. It was only when she turned to hand Greg his mug when she realized what she had done.

His blue, startle eyes meet hers. At least she wasn't the only one who was surprised.

"You-"

"You take your coffee with sugar." She put it down on the counter and stared at him wide-eyed.

And then, it was like a dam burst. House picked her up without thinking, and did a small half swirl with his arms, causing Allison to laugh hysterically.

House put her down a few seconds later, knowing that his leg was going to be screaming at him soon.

Allison landed on her feet and continued to stare up at him, eyes shining in delight.

She had remembered something on her own! She didn't care how little it was, how unimportant it was that House took his coffee with sugar – when she realized something else.

House saw the look on her face and immediately became concerned.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." A hand touched her forehead, as if trying to make sure it was still there. "No pain."

House looked confused, but then a smile – one that few had ever seen and he would claim wasn't real – split across his face. His own hand covered hers.

"No pain?"

"None. At all."

House let his hand drop from her face and then slowly trailed down the side of her face to cup her cheek.

God he wanted to kiss her.

She looked beautiful. She was alive and breathing for one thing. She was in her pajamas, blue pants with white polka dots. She wore a camisole of the same color, and her blonde hair was pulled back into a messy bun. There was nothing more beautiful to him then Cameron in the morning, still in her pajamas, fresh from sleep.

Someone cleared their throat and the two sprang apart, Allison with a deer-in-headlights look on her face.

"I'm not your Dad, Al. Relax."

Eddie grabbed his cup of coffee and disappeared a moment later, kissing her on the cheek with brotherly affection.

The moment was broken and Allison met his eyes for a half second. "We leave at eight, you should go get ready."

* * *

About fifteen minutes later house appeared back downstairs and was introduced to the scrambled mornings that the group usually had. 

Iris was pouring cereal into three bowls while Ollie ran around looking for a certain case file. Eddie was sitting at the table with his coffee and a paper.

There was music on from the Ipod and its speakers. Iris was singing along softly. House could barely make out some country song.

_And she's everything I ever wanted  
And everything I need  
I talk about her I go on and on and on  
Because she's everything to me_

"Do you like Coco Puffs Greg?" Iris's question startled him and he took a moment to respond.

"Umm… Sure." She grabbed another bowl and poured him a generous serving of the cereal before adding milk and handing it to him.

"You got coffee?"

"Right here." House grabbed the mug that was his and sat at the table.

"Where's Allison?"

"Getting dressed. She puts her clothes out the night before in her bathroom."

The bathroom was shared by Ollie and connected the two bedrooms, which was why House probably hadn't seen her.

She rushed down a few minutes later, sliding across the hard wood in her socks.

"Where's my hat?"

"Which one?"

"The one that matches." Iris was standing at the counter eating her cereal and paused for a moment to think.

"Did you check the living room? We were there for SCRABBLE the other day."

She left and appeared moments later a hat pulled firmly over her eyes.

While she was eating – House having already finished his food – he took a moment to examine her.

She wore rattier jeans with some holes in them and frayed cuffs. A simple white shirt with red sleeves and cowboy boots on it read _Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy_. The hat that she had been looking for was a brown hat with a red heart sewn on it. Two messy braids completed her outfit. House had gone with a pair of jeans he had brought, his Nikes and a black Rolling Stones t-shirt.

The bowl of Coco Puffs soon disappeared and Allison grinned at him. "Are you ready?"

"Yeah."

"'Ris?"

"Let's go."

The group had two cars – one for Ollie and Eddie and one for Iris and Allie. They could have had four, but they just didn't feel it was necessary.

Iris grabbed the keys and they bid good-bye to Ollie and Eddie who had a little more time before they left.

* * *

"I can't believe we're doing this." 

"Why not?" Chase flipped through the flights safety instructions. "We agreed that this was the best plan."

"But – I don't know. It's just so sudden."

"Any more talk and they're going to think that the two of you are together." Wilson and Chase both turned and shot looks at Cuddy.

"What?"

"_It's just so sudden._" She mimicked Wilson. "It sounds like you're going to get married."

"We've been meaning to tell you about that Lise-" Wilson deadpanned.

"Yeah. I was wondering if you would be my best man."

"But Rob, I want her to give me away!" Wilson tried to glare at Chase, but they ended up just dissolving into laughter.

The flight attendants voice came on and all three settled back for a long flight.

* * *

"Okay." Allison stepped into the stables and surveyed the horses with thought. "I'm riding Mourning Dove probably. And you're going to ride-" She surveyed the horses, walking between the stalls, pausing and talking softly to various horses. 

"Phoenix."

"Interesting names for horses."

"Each name for a horse has a meaning. Here you don't name a horse because you like the name; you name them because every name has a story. Mourning Dove is the symbol for peace. The woman who named her, Rosa - is gone. Rosa moved her from New York after her daughter Paloma was shot. The Mourning part of its name comes from the bird call. Paloma is Spanish for Dove. In remembrance of her daughter she named the horse Mourning Dove."

"And Phoenix?"

Allison shrugged. "Phillip came here to start over. He came for a new life; he 'rose from the ashes' of his old one to start fresh."

"And you?"

"What about me?"

"Did you name a horse?"

Alison smiled ever so slightly and then nodded. We had a foal born a little while after I started working here. I named her. Her name is Esperanza's Memoria."

"Hopes Memory."

Cameron nodded. "Esperanza can mean give hope to. To give hope to memory. To hope that eventually I would remember."

"Well there was a big breakthrough today. You remember how I take my coffee."

"And it took me three months."

"And I've been here for about three days."

Cameron nodded. She went to a stall and opened it, taking out one of the horses.

"Shh… Hey Mourning. How are you girl?" She began to saddle the horse, talking to her gently the whole time. Mourning was a Palomino with a white star shape on her forehead. "You ready to go for a ride?"

She left her the stall for a moment and disappeared only to reappear with another saddle and a bunch of other stuff House couldn't identify.

Phoenix was a white horse, and it almost struck House as funny. And if not funny, certainly ironic. Here he was being exactly what he said he would never be. Her knight on a white horse.

"Okay, c'mon. Take the reins like this." Cameron grabbed his hand and positioned it exactly where she wanted them. "That way you have a tight enough grip but at the same time Phoenix still has room to move." She disappeared and then reappeared with Mourning Dove.

"Follow me."

* * *

"This is going to take a bit of teamwork." She grabbed a block of wood and dragged it over to where he was standing. 

"You always mount on the left side of the horse."

"Okay."

"Step on the block." He did and she pulled Phoenix so the saddle was close to him. "Lean against Phoenix if you need it and give me your cane."

He gave her his cane and she disappeared – probably to put it with her purse.

"Okay. Now put your left leg in the stirrup. You need to have most of your body weight on it."

Normally Cameron would have just let the person swing up, but she wanted to make sure House could get on with as little pain as possible.

He did and she nodded her approval.

House didn't tell her that he hated being babied because of his infraction. This wasn't really babying, but she was going slower then she would with a person who had full range physical motions.

The old Cameron would have known that, but there was no need to hurt her feelings now. This would be considered as a breakthrough for House and he was excited. Ecstatic - even not that anyone would ever know.

"You're going to have to lift your right leg over the horse and into the other stirrup." House did so, slowly and with a grimace.

"And now?" Cameron stood on the step and showed House the proper way to hold the reins with a Western Saddle. She also demonstrated how to steer and where House had to kick if he wanted to go faster.

"Can't I just hold on to this?" House gestured to the hump in front of him.

"It's called a horn. And no. It's used for roping cattle, so unless you want me to get you a lasso too, hang onto the reins."

She then went over to Mourning Dove and pulled herself up with ease. She didn't need a block and her thin form was soon atop the saddle. She arranged her hands in the same way that she had showed House and then turned around to look at him a grin on her face.

"How long have you been riding?"

She shrugged. "It came naturally to me after I got here. They figured I'd been riding for a while."

"Your family told me that you rode before you walked, cantered before you ran." Cameron laughed and then shrugged.

"I wouldn't know."

There was a soft silence and House took a moment to stare at the horse before turning back to her.

"What exactly am I doing?"

"These are lead horses. Phoenix should follow Mourning Dove. Technically you don't have to do anything but sit in the saddle."

"What if I want to walk next to you?"

"Then you do this." Allison clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth and kicked the horse. House mimicked her and Phoenix whinnied before walking over to Mourning Dove whom Cameron had pulled to a halt.

"C'mon. We can only ride for so long. Otherwise you're going to be really sore tomorrow. Trust me."

* * *

"- And Welcome to Montana." 

Wilson caught the end of the speech as Cuddy elbowed him.

"So where are we going?" Both turned expectantly to look at Chase and he sighed.

Yesterday Chase had traced House's phone call thanks to an old friend of his. He had all the directions and information and would be in charge of navigating on the drive there.

"Some town called Rudyard, Montana. Population 275. It can't be that hard to find them."

"Nope." Cuddy shook her head. "Not in a town that small."

"Well, then what are we waiting for?" Wilson asked. "Let's go."

The three went to grab their baggage and then went to Rent-A-Car. The ride from Great Falls would be a long one. But that was okay. It was like they were looking for the end of a rainbow. The pot of gold that was supposed to be there. Only instead of a rainbow and a pot of gold they were looking for Cameron and House.


	11. Chapter 10

Thanks to jjhikki for beating

* * *

**Chapter 10: Some More Riding and Lunch **

Phoenix walked besides Mourning Dove and House smiled.

"This is actually not that bad once you get the hang of it."

"I love riding. It's just one of those things. Ya'know? Where you can just put your head back and ride and forget everything that's going on. Forget all of your problems forget what you want to and just let the world fade away." Cameron's voice was dreamy and House couldn't help the tiniest chuckle that escaped his lips.

Cameron had closed her eyes but now she turned to look at him a playful grin on her face. "What?"

"You m'dear are quite the person to talk to."

"And why is that?"

"In all of the time that we worked together I don't think that I ever saw you completely relax. I can't count the times I needed to tell you to unclench."

"I guess being a doctor must have been a stressful job, especially working with you."

Cameron frowned and screwed up her face in thought.

"But you did relax from time to time with Foreman and Chase."

"The guys in the picture."

It was a soft statement and House nodded.

"Yes."

"And I didn't relax around you?"

Now they were treading on thin ice and House mentally bashed himself in the head for brining the subject up.

"You did, but I was your boss so the three of you always had straighter faces when I was there."

Cameron accepted the answer with a shrug.

It was frustrating for her to talk about things that she couldn't remember. It was like looking for a flashlight in the dark. She knew that it was there, but she had to feel her way to it. And on the way there she was always tripping over things. Eventually she would succeed, but it would take a lot of hard work and effort.

Allison shook her head. The ride was meant to be relaxing and fun. It wasn't meant for thoughts and headaches. Those were reserved for when she was riding alone and could try to race her thoughts. Some days she would win and others she would end up back at the stable while someone had to call Iris to come pick her up.

Allison cleared those thoughts from her mind. This was so not the time or the place to concentrate on lost memories.

"Do you want to try trotting?"

* * *

"That was fun, but I'm starving,"

Allison laughed. She had convinced Greg to let Phoenix stretch his legs a bit and the horse had happily taken off in a trot.

"Let's go get something to eat then. Burgers okay?" Cameron swung off of Mourning Dove easily, making a face and stretching.

"Yeah. That's fine."

"Iris runs her parents restaurant. It's called Berkeley's Berth, they make good burgers. Then again, I can't remember any other ones."

"What do you eat then?"

"Lots of pizza." Cameron smiled. "No. I've had McDonalds once or twice and we went to Subway and Chipotle, and all of the local restaurants. I just feel like I've missed a lot of things."

"When we get back to New Jersey I'll take you to have some real Mexican, Chinese and Thai." House blurted without thought.

Cameron didn't register his first words for a second and then she startled. "When we get back to New Jersey?"

Christ. He hadn't meant to bring it up yet.

"Alli-"

She didn't hear him though. She had begun pacing her hands clenched.

"What if I don't want to come back Greg? I like it here. It's safe. Everyone knows me. I know everyone. Princeton is big. It's scary. I would have to re-learn everything there. And what would I do? There probably aren't any stables that would hire me. Why do you want me to come back? I worked for you. It's not like you couldn't replace me. It's not like I can go back to being a doctor. What am I supposed to do?"

Tears were shining in her eyes and House took a step forward.

"Unclench would you? When you clench I clench, and then there's a whole thing while we stand there clenched. You know, it doesn't have to be right away. We can leave when you're ready. And-"

House paused. This could be a bad idea. A very bad idea.

_Screw it. _He thought. His lips crashed down onto hers and Allison's arms lifted to wrap around his neck.

He pulled away when he couldn't breathe and Allison stared at him shocked but with the slightest bit of a smile on her face.

"I don't want to hire anyone. I want you to come back because I want you."

She smiled – a full blown Cameron smile – one he had not seen in years and wrapped her arms around him in a hug.

Words were swirling in her head –

_A little whorish to kiss and stab._

_If you need a sperm sample come back without the needle. _

- But they settled around her like a cloud of smoke.

There was no intense pounding in her head; a mild drum beat at the most.

She would deal with that later. Right now she just wanted to stay in the safety of Greg's arms.

House looked down at her.

Maybe things would finally go his way.

For once.

* * *

By the time that Cuddy, Wilson and Chase got to Rudyard they were starving.

"Where are we supposed to eat?" Chase questioned.

"I don't know. Small town, no McDonald's. Do we just pick a random place?"

"Nice Lisa." Wilson snorted. She leaned forward between the two guys, resting her hands on the armrest.

"There's a diner." She pointed her finger towards the end of the road.

"Here." Wilson put on his turn signal and parked in front of a restaurant. The painting on the building read _Berkley's Berth_. "This work?"

"What else can we expect from a small town in the middle of nowhere?"

The three stepped out of the car and into the restaurant.

It was a brightly lit place, the walls cheerfully splatter painted. Pictures hung around the restaurant. Some of people, some of places. There was writing on the walls, and when Cuddy looked closer she realized that the writing was actually quotes.

_You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when. You can decide how you're going to live. Now._

_-Joan Baez_

_Oh, yeah, I'm a gym member. I try to go four times a week, but I've missed the last... twelve hundred times._

_-Chandler, Friends_

The quotes ranged from the likes of the first one Cuddy saw to Martin Luther King Jr.'s _I Have A Dream _Speech to song lyrics.

The space was clean and four menus sat on the table they selected. It was up against a wall and Cuddy continued to read the quotes on the walls.

"Welcome to Berkley's." A waitress appeared before them grinning cheerfully.

"I'm Iris, I'll be your server today. Can I get you anything to drink?"

The three ordered drinks and continued to survey the area.

Iris materialized from the kitchen swiftly with their drinks. She took three orders of burgers before she was gone again.

"So, what do we do now?"

"Ask Iris I guess. Or someone else who works here."

"Ask me what?" Iris appeared with a pitcher of coke to refill their drinks.

"Do you know an Allison Cameron?" She set the pitcher down and took the fourth chair.

"Craig, tell Mario I'm taking my break and he'll have to cover my tables." She called to a young man. He nodded and disappeared.

"Why do you want to know about her?" Iris had known they looked familiar. Known that she had seen the faces before.

"She used to work with us."

Bingo. The faces out of JAMA.

She opened her mouth to answer but the bells jingle cut her off.

House and Cameron walked in Cameron laughing hysterically at something House was saying.

Iris was up out of her chair immediately, her hands grabbing Allison's shoulders. She said something and Allison shrugged before nodding.

She took House's hand and led him towards a back room behind a curtain that none of the three had noticed before.

The three adults were staring at the room Cameron had disappeared into, eyes wide and completely shocked.

Chase stood up as if he were going to follow her, but Iris put her hands on the man's shoulders and forced him back down.

"If you want to see Al there are some things that you need to know first."

Iris disappeared for a split second and returned with a drink of her own. It was a coke, but Wilson had half expected her to have some form of alcohol.

She was talking over her shoulder and they caught the end of her sentence.

"- and call Eddie and Ollie."

Iris sat down and curled a leg underneath her.

"About three months ago I was on my way back from Billings when I came across a car accident. It was pretty bad. I managed to get the woman out of the car before it burned – but the car was completely demolished. There was no way that the person in the car could be traced until she woke up from the coma the accident had put her in."

Iris took a sip of her drink and sighed. "When she finally woke up, she was diagnosed with traumatic amnesia. Eventually the diagnosis was changed to dissocaitive amnesia. Over the months we've learned a few things. Some days Alexis – Allison – remembers little things. Other times she doesn't remember anything. Our local Doctor – Richard – he talked to some old friends and colleges and came to the assumption that the woman we found was Allison Cameron; that's when he sent the letter to your Dr. House. When Al starts to remember things she gets terrible headaches. That's why you can't see her yet. We don't want to send her back to the hospital."

Iris stood. "Greg is talking to her now. We discovered that if we tell her memories before she meets a person it's not as painful."

Cuddy nodded and Iris slipped away with an _I'll be back in a little while_.

The quote that she was staring at had been penned in dark blue sharpie the letter thick and dark.

It was almost an ironic read and she wondered how many times in the past months someone had read it and thought of Allison.

"_I've never tried to block out memories of the past, even though some are painful. I don't understand people who hide from their past. Everything you live through helps to make you the person you are now."_

_- Sophia Loren_

Chase bit back a sigh as he watched it is walk away.

Some things weren't intentional. The brain was funny that way. The memories Allison was suppressing were what made her who she was.

And that was the person that they were looking for. The Allison Cameron who loved House. The one who was happy and naïve and beautiful.

This trip was going to be a lot different then anyone suspected.

* * *

Quotes from Half-Wit 


	12. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11: Swapping and Talking**

Allison was pacing back and forth in the employees break room.

"You're going to wear a hole in the floor."

"Been there, done that."

"Allison._Stop._" She paused and turned to look at him.

"How can you be calm?"

"So calm?"

She ignored him and continued to speak. "There are three people out there. People who know me, and I don't remember them at all. I don't know how I should act around them. Iris is going to tell them that I lost my memory and then they're going to give her that look – the one like I killed a puppy. I can't do this. I can't be Allison Cameron to them. I can't even be Allison Cameron to myself."

He stood up and when she turned to do another lap of the room grabbed her arms.

"Breathe."

She inhaled harshly and House pulled her against him.

"Having a panic attack won't solve the problem."

"I'm not having a panic attack!"

"You were borderline hyperventilating."

Iris stepped in and rolled her eyes at them. "Guys, I don't think it's a good time to be arguing about what makes a panic attack a panic attack."

House turned to look at her. Did she really want to freak Allison out all over again?

She ignored his glare.

"Aren't you two hungry? You were out riding for a while."

Cameron smiled and nodded her head.

"Burgers 'ris?"

"That's all you're getting out of me. Ollie and Eddie will be here soon, but I need to steal your man for a moment."

"Not 'til I can trade you."

"That sounds wrong on so many levels."

"Why? Because it sounds like boyfriend swapping?"

"Hey." House turned to look at both of them. "There will be no swapping of anything. Except maybe spit, But not on purpose, or between the four of us."

Cameron blushed and Iris snorted. "Too much information. _Way_too much information."

"Oh come on. It makes the day interesting." House pointed out.

"The day is always interesting."

The curtain opened before anyone could respond and Ollie and Eddie stepped in.

"Hey kiddo." Eddie greeted while Ollie just grinned at her. "How you doing?"

"I'm okay." She slipped from House's arms and turned to hug the other two men.

"Come on." Iris walked over to House and put her hand on his shoulder. "The faster you talk to them the faster you get back here."

House nodded resigned. There was really nothing he could say to that.

"I'll be right back Allison."

She nodded, walking over and clinging to him for a split second before letting go.

"Okay."

* * *

House limped out of the break room and towards Chase, Cuddy and Wilson.

"Did you miss me that much?"

His voice was a high falsetto and it caused Cuddy to look up while Chase and Wilson turned around to look at him.

"House."

"Present."

"_Greg._" Wilson stretched his name and House sighed before dropping into the seat next to Cuddy.

"Yes, sir?"

"What the hell is going on?"

Lisa kept her voice soft, but there was something behind it – an emotion House couldn't place.

He dropped his act for a moment.

"Alli - Cameron" He corrected himself "has amnesia. Like Iris told you. And when I say none I mean zitch, zilch, nada, none, nothing. As in she doesn't remember anything prior to the car accident. She doesn't remember us. I'm running out of words here. Someone interrupt me with a question."

"When can we see her?" Chase asked.

"I knew wombats were good for something." House exclaimed. The trio shot him dirty looks. They were here to see Cameron and bring her home to New Jersey, not to listen to House being an ass. They had that on an everyday basis.

"Truth is I don't know when you can see her. The first time that she saw me the flashbacks were so intense that she passed out. I don't think that anyone wants a repeat of that performance. So I have come up with a plan."

"You actually have a plan?" Cuddy asked in disbelief.

"Yes."

"House,_you_ don't do plans, you never plan anything. You act at the spur of the moment, which always ends up getting us in trouble or the hospital sued."

"I actually have a plan today. And I don't normally plan because the best laid plans of mice – which by the way, mice don't have brains big enough to make plans – and men often go astray."

"So what is this wonderful plan that you came up with House?"

"We are going to slowly introduce you to her. We'll start with dear Cuddles here. So I get to tell Allison a bunch of random personal information to make her feel more comfortable as well as what I really need to tell her." House rubbed his hands together and cackled evilly.

"I'm almost scared." Wilson remarked.

Truth was though, he was happy that his friend was acting the way he was. House hadn't been House in months. Over the months the lines on his face had deepened, his limp became more pronounced and his Vicodin count was worse then usual. There was almost a lightness to House now and Wilson was relieved.

It wasn't anything corny, and House was still addicted to Vicodin. He wasn't becoming a fairy tale and rainbows and puppies' type of guy, but the lines on his face seemed smoother, the smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth causing his eyes to almost sparkle.

"Don't be scared Jiminy Cricket, you're after Cuddles. Wombat-Boy is last. Unless you prefer to be called a Brit. Do you have a preference Chasey-Wasey?"

Chase rolled his eyes.

"I want to see Cameron sooner rather then later, but that's not what you're talking about. So no."

"You have the most history with her, so you would be the last to go."

Iris appeared at their table with a tray of burgers and fries on it.

"Are you going to stay out here with them, or eat with Allie?"

"I'll start telling her about the three of them now, so I'll be back there."

"You might want to call Richard."

"Is there going to be a problem when you start talking about them?" Iris asked worriedly.

"I don't know. But I do know that the nearest hotel is two hours away and that there's no way that the three of them are making that commute everyday. I also know that you have no more room in your house for guests. So Richard it is."

"I'll call him. They might have to share rooms though." She put the plate on the table and disappeared.

"I'll be back in a little while." He informed them before limping back to Allison – back out of sight, but not out of mind.

* * *

_Meanwhile_

"What if I don't remember them?"

"Then you make new memories." Ollie watched Allison as she began her pacing again, wringing her hands nervously.

"But what if I can't?"

"Sweetheart, there's always room for new memories. The good ones and the bad ones."

"Greg wants to take me back to New Jersey." She spun to face the two men and put her hands on her hips, waiting for a response.

Neither flinched.

"You knew?"

"We overheard him and Richard talking about it earlier."

"And you didn't go insane?" That question she directed at Eddie.

"Ollie held me back. Plus, it wasn't out conversation, so we couldn't barge in exactly. And then we thought about it. Allie, in one way or another we're going to lose you. Because eventually you'll remember, or you'll want to go back. Or maybe you won't want to go back, but you want to move to a bigger city. And we'll keep in touch. E-mails everyday and we'll visit. I promise that you won't loose us. And if anything is ever too much you can come right back here."

Allie walked over and sat next to Ollie, her head resting on his shoulder.

"Allie, only, _you_ can make that decision. No one else. Remember that." Ollie continued. "No one besides you has any say in if or when you leave Rudyard. No ifs, ands, or buts. _You_decide. You control your own life. And if you don't want to leave, we won't make you. If you don't want to stay we won't hold you back. It's as simple as that."

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For being here."

"Rain or shine Allie, rain or shine or tornados. We get through everything."

* * *

Foreman stared at the secretary in astonishment as she repeated herself yet again.

"Dr. Cuddy took a few days off."

"She's the Dean of Medicine!"

"And sometimes people get sick. Or they need a personal day."

The woman glared at him. She was in a foul mood today.

"Is there anyway that I can reach her?"

"Through me."

"Any other way? It's very important." Foreman tried to smile at her sweetly, but it didn't work. If anything her frown increased.

"Nope."

Cameron would have been able to get through to her.

And that was when the truth hit him. Cuddy wasn't sick.

She was where Cameron was.

Cameron.

The answer to his problems.

He sat down across from the crabby woman.

"Let me tell you the truth Sue. You see, Dr. Cameron is alive, and-"

* * *

_The best laid plans of mice and men often go astray_

_Of Mice and Me_n


	13. Chapter 12

**Any mistakes are my own. Let me know...**

**Jess**

* * *

**Chapter 12: Arrivals and Meetings**

Foreman stepped off of the plane, the blue eyed man following silently.

After telling Sue the truth it had been easy enough to get the information out of the woman.

The three where in some place named Rudyard, Montana. Some small town that few people lived in. Where you knew everyone's name and nothing was ever private.

How fun.

Foreman sighed and went to get their baggage.

The whole time on the plane the other man had said nothing, just sat there quietly.

They had a car to get and then a long drive to get to the little town in the Middle-Of-Nowhere-USA.

* * *

House finished his burger in relative silence. Allison was sitting next to him, her feet curled under her.

"I have lessons today, I can learn about Lisa later." Greg looked at her. Something was bothering her.

"If you want to we can wait until tomorrow."

He cared to an extent about Cuddy, Chase and Wilson, but his main concern was Cameron.

The months that she had been gone had taken a toll on all of them, but the months that she had spent lost in a haze of fog and no names had been worse for her then it had for them.

"I mean, it's not that big of a deal, right?" She continued talking as if he hadn't spoken. "A day won't change my life. Well, maybe it will. It might change their life. An entire moment could change you. Look at what happened to me. Do you want to come to lessons with me? Eddie and Ollie are going back to work and Richard is driving Cuddy, Chase and Wilson to his house so that they can put their stuff away and then he's taking them to his office. I don't know why though. I think-"

House set his burger down carefully, wiped his hands on a napkin and turned to look at her.

Her eyes were a deep blue, but there was a fear hidden in the depths.

"Allison."

She closed her mouth and stared at the table.

"What if I can't be who I'm supposed to be?"

And there it was.

"It doesn't matter."

Her head jerked up and she stared at him in surprise.

"You are who you are. The experiences that you had now are going to change you forever. If you remember who you are there's no saying that you will be the Allison Cameron we all knew. There's also no saying that if you don't get your memory back you _won't_ be Allison Cameron. Experiences change you. No matter what they are."

There was almost a harsh quality to his tone, and Allison seemed to pick up on it.

"I'm going to go to the lesson."

She stood up abruptly, seeming to forget that she invited him to go with her.

He stood too, but she shook her head.

"Stay with Wilson, Chase and Cuddy."

"Al-"

"I'm fine I promise. _We're_ fine. It's just been a lot to digest and I need some time to think. I'll be back, don't worry."

But he was worried. How did he explain to her that after losing her he wasn't going to let her go? He could tell her that, but he didn't want to scare her.

"I have a break between two and three, why don't you come out then? I just need a little time to myself."

It was a compromise and House sighed.

"I'll be there at two."

"Good." She stood on her toes and kissed him. "I'll see you in a few hours."

* * *

"Hi Miss Alex."

"Hello Jamie, how are you today?"

"I'm good. Mom said that I'm supposed to call you Miss Allison now. Is that your before-Rudyard name?"

It was hard to explain amnesia to a six year old, but they had tried.

"Yes, it is. You can call me Miss Allie if you want."

"I like that better then Allison. Allison is too many letters."

The little girl hopped from foot to foot impatiently.

"Who am I riding today? Can we start?"

Allison laughed. She needed to think and she needed time alone but Jamie was one of her favorite people to teach.

The little girl had a joy for riding and a natural ability that her mother Miriam also possessed. She wanted her daughter to get professional training though, which was why the little girl was Allison's student.

"We're going to start by you helping me saddle Dreamer; do you remember how?"

"Of course. You don't forget something like that. Mom says it's a natural ability that you keep in here."

The child tapped her heart solemnly with her fist.

"That's true."

And it was. Allison had known how to saddle a horse when she had first gotten here.

There were some things that you couldn't forget.

**BALF**

"Excuse me; we're looking for Allison Cameron?"

"What do you want with her?" there was a woman sitting the in waiting area doing paperwork. She was in jeans and a t-shirt but didn't seem to work there.

The first place that the two had found was a stable.

A painted wooden sign had proudly proclaimed

_Dream Catcher's Stable_

_If you are a dreamer, come in. If you are a dreamer, a wisher, a liar, a prayer, a magic-bean-buyer. If you're a pretender, come sit by my fire for we have some flax golden tales to spin. Come in! Come in!_

The blue eyed man stared at the woman for a long moment. Foreman was about to answer but Cole cut to the chase.

Three simple words could make a person speechless.

"She's my sister."

* * *

"That was great Jamie!"

The little girl reined the pony in and smiled at her.

"Really?"

"Really, really. You have very good form. We have to work a little bit on getting you to stay steady on the trotting, but you're doing great."

"Thanks Miss Allison."

"Your welcome sweetie. Why don't you do one more lap trotting on Dreamer and then we'll walk and unsaddle him."

"Okay."

Jamie gripped the pony's reins tighter and bit her lip in concentration as she kicked the pony in encouragement.

* * *

"Allison is in the middle of my daughters lesson right now, you should wait until after she finishes. If it's urgent I can go get her."

"No, it's okay." Cole sat down and rested his head in his hands.

There had been too much in one day.

He had found out that his sister was alive, and now he was there to see her.

And she was teaching riding lessons.

Which meant she knew exactly what she was doing.

Riding was her passion – it had been her way of escaping reality since they were kids.

But why the hell hadn't she called him?

* * *

Allison led Jamie out of the barn and into the main area, guiding her firmly by her shoulders. 

"When do I get to come back? When will I see you again?"

"In a week Jame, just like always."

"But I _can't_ wait that long!"

Allison spotted Miriam sitting next to some man and caught her eye.

"You'll have to talk to your mom about that."

"Okay. Mom! Mom! Can I ride more?"

The woman stood and laughed she kissed the girls forehead and then pulled out her check book.

"We'll talk about it."

"Same time next week Ale- Allison?"

"Yeah, unless something happens. You'll hear about it."

"Okay dear. Have a good day."

Jamie hugged Allison one last time and then the two walked out.

Allison turned to the other people in the waiting room.

The owner – Bernie – always took his lunch break between noon and one. He would be back in about ten minutes.

There were other people – Claire and Martin but they both had lessons now.

Rudyard was small enough that they trusted everyone enough to leave the door unlocked. And it wasn't like they kept any money in the stable.

Bridles and saddles and horses, but the equipment was always locked and there was always at least one person by the horses – there were people who owned horses in the stables here constantly as well.

"Can I help you gentlemen?"

Blue eyes met hers and she couldn't help the gasp that escaped her lips or the pounding in her head.

She sunk to the floor, whimpering in pain.

* * *

House couldn't take it anymore.

It was one now; she had been gone for an hour.

And he _needed_ to make sure she was okay.

Wilson, Chase and Cuddy had gone to drop their stuff off at Richard's for the moment.

Iris caught him staring at the clock and grinned.

"Be free. Worse comes to worse she gets mad at you for a short period of time. She'll get over it."

She handed him the car keys and grinned.

"Eddie and Ollie can give me a ride tonight."

House barely had time to mutter thanks before he was out the door.

* * *

"Cameron!"

Foreman was at her side instantly, but she batted his hands away from her and continued to clutch her head in pain.

She could see the man trying to help her in her mind.

He was in a hospital bed, and was holding a needle in his hand.

"_I lie you, really… we have a good time working together. But ten years from now, we're not gonna be hanging out, having dinners. Maybe we'll exchange Christmas cars, say "Hi," give a hug it we're at the same conference… we're not friends, we're colleagues… and I don't have anything to apologize for."_

"Allie? Allie are you okay?"

A hand touched her forehead and she shook.

The voice was familiar and it sent more pain.

"_Allie! Come on!"_

"_Cole, this is a bad idea." The boy turned to grin at her. He had her eyes and a bowl cut of almost black hair that he kept swiping out of his eyes. They were in shorts and t-shirts and on the outskirts of the woods on their property._

"_Never!"_

_He continued to pull her along and came to a tree._

"_What do you think?"_

"_It's big."_

"_It's our new house."_

* * *

"_This is why we left! Bad grades! A 'B' in math? You'll never amount to anything!"_

_Allison looked down. Her feet hit the bars of the stool she was sitting on._

_Her parents were smart enough and rich enough to sit around and do nothing with their lives._

"_I don't want to see you Allison, go your room!" She jumped off the chair and Cole followed her without a second thought._

_They couldn't wait until they left and life would go back to normal._

* * *

"_Cole, we're going to be late!"_

_He stepped out of his apartment and locked the door behind him._

"_We're taking the bike Al, we can weave."_

"_Fine."_

"_Let's go."_

"_We're not going to make the light."_

"_We will."_

_They did make it, but the driver behind them wanted to make it also._

_The car bumped the back tire of the motorcycle ever so slightly and sent it spiraling out of control._

* * *

"_Allie! Oh thank God you're okay!"_

"_Grandma. Where's Cole? Is he okay?"_

"_He'll be fine sweetheart."_

_Her eyes dropped._

"_His arm got pinned in the wreckage, they had to amputate."_

_Everything was NOT okay._

* * *

"_Al, they want to fit me for my prosthetic today, can you take me?"_

"_Sure."_

_Allison set down her stuff in the cafeteria and curled a leg under herself as she began to read a magazine. This would take a while, so she was going to grab something to eat in a minute._

"_Excuse me?" A man grinned at her when she looked up. _

"_Yes?"_

"_My friend Joe over there just bet me twenty bucks that I couldn't get a beautiful girl like you to let a guy like me a cup of coffee. And I really wouldn't mind twenty bucks. Or a beautiful girls company. So what do you say?"_

_She shook her head and offered him a hand._

"_Allison Cameron."_

"_Danny Payton."_

* * *

"_When I was in College I… I fell in love, and I got married. And…"_

"_At that age the chances of a marriage lasting…"_

"_It lasted six months. Thyroid cancer metastasized to his brain. There was nothing they could do. I was 21, and I watched my husband die."_

"_I'm sorry. But that's not the whole story. It's a symptom, not your illness. Thyroid cancer would have been diagnosed at least a year before his death, you knew he was dying when you married him. Must have been when you first met him; and you married him anyway. You can't be that good a person and well adjusted."_

"_Why?"_

"_Because you wind up crying over centrifuges."_

"_Or hating people?"_

* * *

"_Where are we going?"_

"_I'm not telling."_

"_But Rob, I want to know."_

"_To bad. It's a surprise, it's my Wednesday. I get to choose."_

_Cameron followed him obediently as he kept one hand over her eyes._

"_Okay, now you can open them." She stared at the stable. _

"_You didn't!"_

"_I figured I could try it once." Chase shrugged. He wasn't prepared for the light form of Allison Cameron to be hurled at him as she squealed._

"_Thank you Rob!"_

* * *

House stepped into the stable and froze.

Allison lay curled on the floor holding her head in pain.

He rushed over as fast as his cane would allow.

"Allison?"

The familiar voice sent pain and relief through her.

House lowered himself painfully to the ground and Allison launched herself at him.

"I remember. I remember everything."

She sobbed into his chest for a few seconds as House tried to calm her, but the pull was too great and soon she let the black silence consume her.

* * *

Quote from Sleeping Dogs Lie, Fidelity, Shel Silverstein 


	14. Chapter 13

Won't get into the mess that's going on in my life. Updates will take a bit of time.

* * *

**Chapter 13: It All Comes Rushing Back**

"Allison? Allie?"

She groaned and batted an arm in the air. "Lights."

Instantly the light that was hitting her dimmed. It was a relief, but it wasn't good enough.

Pain, pain and more pain.

Everything hurt.

"Sweetie, you need to open your eyes."

She felt a cool hand on her forehead and sighed in relief.

"'Ris."

Someone she felt comfortable with. Someone who wasn't making her head pulse ever minute as words and thoughts hit her fast and furious.

"Yeah, I'm here. Can you look at me?"

Blue eyes cracked open and stared at her.

"I remember. And it hurts."

A tear slid down her face quickly followed by another one and then another.

"It hurts so much."

"Shh…" Iris crawled onto the bed Allison was lying on and wrapped an arm around her.

House had insisted that they not take her to a hospital.

_You have six qualified doctors here. I'm pretty sure that we can take care of her come rain and apocalypses._

_Richard hadn't argued._

_Brining Allison to a hospital would only mean an IV of morphine, nurses, bright lights and tests. A cold, harsh reality. Rudyard was safer._

"Why don't you go back to sleep. I'll have Richard up the pain meds."

"Can – I want – Cole?" Allison finally managed to gasp out.

Iris nodded and stood up. "I'll get him sweetie."

Minutes later Cole stepped into the room. Richard had gone in seconds before and given her some drugs to help with the pounding headache she had.

"Hey Hell's Bells." The nickname had been coined years ago and it caused Allison to smile weekly.

"Ace."

He stepped over to her bed and she scooted over so he could lie down next to her.

It reminded Cole of when they were little. When one would have a nightmare the other one would go and lay in their room until they fell back asleep.

This time though, he wasn't sure who was comforting who.

"Get some sleep Bell's." Her eyes drifted shut on their own accord. She had many things to ask him, but they could wait until later.

* * *

Seven and a half hours later Allison awake to find Cole writing in a notebook he always brought with him and waiting for her to wake up.

The pain had lessened greatly and as Cameron searched her memory she was grateful to realize that there were only some blank patches.

"How are you feeling?"

"I hurt." The pain wasn't almost gone, but Allison wasn't going to tell her brother that. And anyway, she wasn't really referring to the physical pain.

"I know sis."

She buried her head in his shoulder – another movement from childhood.

"I thought you were dead." He whispered. Tears pricked the corners of his eyes and he let them fall. He didn't have to prove anything to anyone.

His sister was back from the dead. And she would be staying. For a long time.

Until they were old and gray.

He would say forever, but forever wasn't possible.

"I didn't know what to think. Everything – it's all coming back. And I have so many questions."

"Like what?"

Some were about family, but others – most of them – were about the blue eyed man that she had spent the last few days with.

The House she remembered wasn't the one that she was seeing in Rudyard.

"He changed Bells."

Twin talk after all those years still existed.

"How do you know?"

"They all went out to Grandpa and Nana's farm for the funeral. The man that you described to me was not the one I met. Dr. Wilson told me that when you died a part of him died with you."

Allison had learned at a young age that if you didn't know what to say keep your trap shut and didn't let the flies in.

Cole met her eyes and nodded. They had a policy in the family: absolute truth. No matter how much it hurt.

"And it's true. Bell's, we thought you were dead for almost three months. And none of us had a chance to say good-bye. None of us even really got a chance to mourn you."

"How are Grandpa and Nana?" She was afraid. Afraid that they were dead. That she hadn't been able to go to the funeral. Or say good-bye. They were her family. They were the people who raised her, they were her parents. No matter what a birth certificate said.

"Alive and kickin'. I think that finding out that you're alive will add another twenty years."

They continued to chat about people from the town – their conversation only disrupted for a minute when Richard did his half hourly check on her.

"And what about you? What've you been up to?"

"I met a girl."

"Name?" Immediately she slipped into full sister mode.

"Sleep."

"Her name is Sleep?" Her mind was still a little fuzzy. She didn't remember all the jokes from their childhood.

'Meeting a girl' could have been code for anything from parents were home to the fact that _someone_ did _something_inappropriate in their small town.

Cole stood and kissed her forehead.

"No. Your name is sleep. As in you should rest."

"I've been sleeping all day!"

"And now you'll be sleeping all night."

"Not tired."

"But you're in pain."

"No."

"Yes you are. Get some sleep Hells Bell's I'll be here in the morning."

"Will you -" She paused. God damn it, why did it have to be so hard?

She knew who she wanted, but she was scared.

Scared of what she wasn't exactly sure.

Rejection?

Being laughed at?

Being treated like glass?

All of her memories of House were back. And they weren't good.

That didn't mean that they were bad, it just meant that some of them were painful. Some of them made her wish that she could go back in time and undo mistakes made.

"Do you want me to get him Allie? He's been out there pacing. I'm pretty sure he wore a hole in the floor. He's worried."

That twin talk again.

In came in handy when there were thoughts that just couldn't be put into words.

"Yes please."

Cole bent down and kissed her forehead again.

He didn't want to leave Allie, but there were other people who wanted to see her.

There were phone calls to make and some more tears to be shed. But Cole would get through it. And so would Allie.

Life went on. There was tragedy everyday, everywhere, but the world kept spinning. There were also miracles. Like the one that he had witnessed when he walked into a stable to find his sister alive and healthy.

But it didn't matter to most of the world if Allison was alive or not. Because no matter how much pain you were in there was a lesson that had been learned a long time ago:

Life goes on.

* * *

_Earlier_

"What the hell did you do to her?"

House slammed Foreman against a wall, one hand clutching the man's throat so hard that he couldn't catch a breath.

Richard had been called and now they were in the 24-Hour Treatment Center that Richard ran in Rudyard.

"I didn't do anything to her. We walked in and she freaked out." Foreman was able to gasp out as House lessened the pressure on his throat slightly.

"Of course she did you idiot."

"Greg." Richard touched his arm lightly. "At least beat him up outside. I just got the floors cleaned."

Eddie chuckled darkly as he walked out of the room that Allison was in. Iris was sitting with her and Ollie was dealing with the concerned people of Rudyard.

"I'll join you."

Foreman stared at the two of them. "So because _she_ left you suddenly have the right to beat _me_ up?"

"It's called amnesia you idiot."

"But – I – _what_?" Foreman was confused, but he could feel a fist inside of his stomach.

He_knew_ on a higher level that Cameron would never intentionally let everyone think that she was dead – not many people would – but it was easier to just pretend that she was being a bitch.

"Why did I hire you?"

"For his breaking and entering skills." Chase cracked from where he was sitting.

"You're now my second favorite duckling Chase."

Iris stepped out of the room Allison was in and shook her head.

House immediately dropped Foreman to the ground and turned to look at Iris.

"She needs more pain meds and she's asking for Cole."

Cole stood up immediately but Richard was faster and a few minutes later he walked out and Cole stepped in.

"You guys must be hungry."

Wilson caught on to what Iris was insinuating and nodded.

They had just eaten minutes ago but the alternative was letting a furious House sit next to Foreman for who knew how long.

Over eating was better then murder charges.

"Yeah we are."

"Good, c'mon. My diners down the road."

Chase, Cuddy and Wilson all stood. Foreman had no choice but to follow and Eddie and Ollie left as well. It was only House, Cole and Richard.

After about twenty minutes in Allison's room Cole poked his head around the door.

"She's sleeping."

"Everyone else just left to go get something to eat. Are you hungry?" Richard asked kindly.

Cole shook his head uncertainly.

"I told Hell's Bells I wouldn't leave."

House had to cover his mouth to hide the smirk that was caused by the nickname.

"With the amount of morphine I gave her for the pain she should be out for a few hours. And Dr. House will be here if she wakes up and needs anything."

"I guess so then."

Cole sighed and followed Richard out of the place with a backwards glance.

It was only then that House realized what Allison's Rudyard family had done.

They had given him time alone with her.

And even if she was sleeping that was something that he would forever be grateful for.

Slowly he made his way to her.

Sitting on the side of her bed House grasped her hand and dipped his head, finally allowing the tears to fall.

* * *

_Back to present time_

"She wants to see you Dr. House."

Cole announced as he stepped out of his sisters room.

House was out of his seat like a shot.

The amount of Vicodin he had swallowed throughout the day allowed him to do that with minimal pain.

He shuffled towards her door and paused before grasping the handle firmly and slipping into the room.

* * *

"House."

It was a raspy voice that greeted him and Cameron cleared her throat before repeating his name. If House had been an emotional person it would have made him want to cry.

"Allison."

He couldn't go back to calling her Cameron just yet. The woman that he had spent the last few days with had been Allison. Not Cameron, not Alexis, not his employee or his subordinate, but the woman who had first walked into his office. The strong, beautiful woman that he had hired. Before he broke her a little more.

"You don't have to do that ya'know."

Her words were slightly slurred and it scared House. He got a cup of water which seemed to help diminish her raspy voice and the way her words were all one.

It was a simple over-protective sisterly feeling that Allison had had since she was a child that allowed her to hide things from her brother.

If she was in pain, he wasn't going to know how much.

Now that he was gone she let the pain flow around her in waves. She wouldn't be able to hide it from House if she tried, so why bother?

"Do what?"

"Call me Allison. It makes you uncomfortable."

Avoidance was the best tactic – something that she had learned from the man standing in front of her – and Allison would rather talk about her name then her pounding head or awkward moments the two had shared.

Right now she was regretting asking Cole to send Greg in. What had she been thinking?

"No. I think I'll stick with calling you Allison. It is, after all, your name."

House limped slowly over to her bed and took the chair that Cole had at first occupied.

"I -"

"Alli-"

They both paused and looked down, clearly uncomfortable.

House tapped his cane and Allison picked lint off of the blanket that was covering her legs.

"You go." She said simply.

House wasn't going to argue with her.

"How do you feel?"

It wasn't what he wanted to say, but it was safe.

"I'm okay. Besides the fact that I feel like my head got run over by a truck."

House stood, but she shook her head.

"No. No more morphine right now. I want a clear head. I feel like I've been living in a fog. And it's better to feel something then to feel nothing at all."

"If the pain gets any worse-"

"I'm a doctor too."

"You haven't been for three months."

She visibly flinched and House sighed.

"Sorry."

Allison blinked and tried to keep the shock off of her face. House never apologized. To anyone. Ever.

"It's just taking some getting used to. The past few months have been a mix of a dream and a nightmare. Everyone thinking that I was dead -"

Allison let her voice trail off.

"But you're not."

"But I'm not."

"And then right after you came here Eddie told me-" Allison paused. Completing that thought would be emotional suicide.

"Eddie told you-?"

"Nothing. It doesn't matter."

"If it's causing you to turn that shade of red, I'd say that it does."

"I'm – No. We're not talking about this."

"Why not?"

"Because I said so."

"That's a crap answer."

House was busy arguing with her. The moment she had started to clench her body and glare he could forget that she hadn't been Allison Cameron and had been Alexis Peters. He could pretend that they were in the hospital. That everything was normal.

Well, almost, anyway.

"Allison, what did Eddie say?"

He couldn't help the irritancy in his voice anymore then she could help the fact that the tears would be welling in her eyes soon.

She gave in with a sigh.

This is why it was hard with him.

"Eddie said that you love me."


	15. Chapter 14

**I know it's not very long, but I'm hoping to get back into the swing of things soon. Thanks to MissingCanceledShows for beta'ing and life in general. :)**

* * *

**Chapter 14: Four Letter Words**

_Earlier_

Foreman stirred his coke with his straw, watching as it created a mini tornado.

The eye of the storm.

That's where he was now.

Chase, Cuddy and Wilson were sitting with him and Cole talking quietly.

"Are we just gonna sit here?" Foreman asked.

"Yes." Wilson's voice was oddly calm. "Would you rather go back there right now and stay with House?"

Foreman opened his mouth to reply but Cuddy cut him off.

"If you say that you would rather be doing your job, I will fire you. The choice to come here was yours."

Foreman pursed his lips. It hadn't really been his choice.

In a way it had, but when people kept things from him and he felt that he had the right to know, it wasn't just something that he could let sit.

Cole sighed and stood up.

"I'm going to go make some phone calls and meet you back at the hospital. I can't sit still."

He walked out, leaving the table in silence.

* * *

The phone rang only once before it was snatched up – an older woman's voice instantly coming into Cole's ear.

"Baby! How've you been? You need to call more often, I get worried. When is that next book of yours coming out? The girls are all excited to read it. You're Gramp's here with me. We were just about to sit down and take a rest. Do you want to talk to him too?"

Cole grinned.

His grandmother had always been a fast talking no nonsense woman.

"It'd be great if you put me on speaker Nana." He said simply. "And then if you want to sit down, I have something to tell the two of you-"

"Oh! Are you engaged? I knew it!" Her voice cut him off again and Cole leaned against the brick side of Iris' restaurant.

Getting the truth out about Allie and then explaining everything to them could take awhile.

"No Nana, it's something else."

"Oh fine." There was a general rustling, the sound of someone being placed on speaker – the echoing quality phones seemed to have – and Gramp's gruff voice telling Cole that he was there and sitting down as well.

"Now what's all this fuss about?"

Cole sighed. "I don't know how to say this, but I'll try. A few months ago a woman named Iris Ber-"

"Did you get her pregnant?"

"Nana. Please."

There was silence and Cole continued. "- was driving home from Billings. She came across a car accident. Soon after that the car began to fill with smoke. She and another person were able to get the woman in the accident safely out of the car. She recovered, but was diagnosed with amnesia."

"Is this a new story that you're writing?"

"I'm not done Gramps." Cole sighed again. He didn't know what to say. "The woman in the car accident recovered her full memory only a few hours ago. She had been getting bits for a few days. Before that she had been going by the name Alexis Peterson. They now know her to be Allison Cameron."

There was silence and then Nana's broken voice.

"You take that back right now Cole Andrew Cameron."

"I can't Nana. She's alive and she's here."

His voice cracked on the word _alive_.

"Tell me this isn't a joke." Gramp's voice was low, but there was a quality to it that Cole associated with the rare times Allison and him had gotten in serious trouble.

"It's not."

"Where are you exactly?"

"In a small town called Rudyard in Montana."

"We'll be there soon."

"No."

"What? You tell us that our Allie is alive and then expect us to sit on our bums and do nothing?"

"I don't think that having more people out here will help her Nana. She's scared and in a little bit of pain. Just wait a few more days. You can talk to her doctor if you want."

"No. I believe you. Now tell me how she is."

Cole rested his head against the wall in relief.

Two people were done and they could take care of the entire town and family. Now he just had to call various friends, which he would do later.

Right now he was going back to see Allison.

* * *

_"Eddie said that you love me."_

She barely paused to catch her breath after the words escaped her mouth.

"And when he told me that - I was Alexis, and not Allison, and at first I thought he was kidding – but then I thought he wasn't and now I don't know – we're back at the beginning. Or at least I am. You probably never left the beginning, Cole said-"

She was stopped by a hand covering her mouth.

"Stop. You're rambling. And when you ramble you clench and then there's this whole thing with the clenching, and – just take a deep breath."

Allison did as instructed and House limped out of the room to get another IV full of morphine from Richard.

He appeared moments later, IV-less, holding something else.

"No more morphine for you, Tylenol. Richard doesn't want you to become dependent on the stuff." House widened his eyes. "And to think that you might have been upgraded from Duckling to Mini-Me."

"Because that was my goal in life."

"Now _that's_ just sad." He jeered. She yawned and his eyes softened a fraction.

"Get some sleep, okay?"

"I've _been_ sleeping."

"Get some more sleep. It's supposed to do the body good. And-" House dropped his voice down to a dramatic whisper. "I know these things. I'm a doctor."

Cameron giggled and yawned again.

"Sleep."

"Will you - ?" She paused not wanting to push her luck.

"I'll be here when you wake up." House finished impatiently. The suddenly meek Cameron was making him angry – she _wasn't_ a meek little girl who was scared of him. At least she hadn't been afraid of setting him off when she had no idea who he was. She had just acted on instinct. And now she wasn't.

Allison allowed her eyes to drift close and House sighed, sitting down and resting his head on his cane.

"Eddie was right." The words were a whisper. One that Cameron didn't hear. But one that Iris did.

She grinned and disappeared into the hallway practically skipping.

It was something that they knew – that Greg was in love with Allison – but it was different hearing him say it.

* * *

"I know something you don't know." Iris whispered as she slipped into the chair between Ollie and Eddie.

"Really?" Ollie asked, sounding bored.

"Greg is in love with Allison!" Iris kept her voice down so that Cole, Foreman, Cuddy and Wilson couldn't here her.

"We know 'ris."

"But he told her. Well, she was sleeping, but he told her. Before we just assumed, but now we know it's true."

"Wait, what? Slow down and repeat."

"I only got part of the conversation. They were arguing over something and then she said that you told her that Greg loved her. He got Tylenol from Richard and then when she fell asleep he told her that he loved her."

Ollie laughed. "And the matchmaker is back."

Iris mock glared at him. "Take that back Oliver."

He shook his head and began to sing teasingly.

_"Matchmaker, matchmaker,__  
Make me a match,__  
Find me a find,  
Catch me a catch  
_

_Matchmaker, matchmaker,  
Look through your book  
And make me a perfect match."_

"Ollie?" Eddie asked.

"Yeah?"

"Don't quit your day job. Ever."

Ollie laughed and Eddie shot him a half hearted glare.

"Shutting up now."

"Good idea."

* * *

Allison awoke a few hours later to find Greg and Cole sitting on opposite sides of her bed talking in hushed voices.

They didn't seem to be arguing, just comparing motorcycles which made her grin.

She had always seen the two of them getting along well.

"Hey Hell's Bells." Cole said not breaking off the conversation he was having.

"Ruin my fun."

"Uh-huh. Sorry for knowing that you stop snoring when you wake up."

"I don't snore!"

"No, you don't. But I've known you long enough to know that when you stop breathing and then try to make it sound like you're asleep, you're really not. How do you feel?"

Allison stuck her tongue out at her brother and then shrugged. "Fine."

"Wow. That was a stupid answer."

Allison paused and then groaned while House stared at them in confusion.

"Fine." Cole explained. "Freaked Out, Insecure, Neurotic and Emotionally Unstable." He eyed her for a minute. "You're going to go insane on me in a minute too."

"Another acronym?" House asked dryly.

"Nope. Insane as in the act of Hell's Bells screaming at me repeatedly."

Cole's voice was affectionate.

"You called Nana and Gramp's, didn't you?"

"You have some days, so calm down."

Allison could feel House watching her and she dipped her head down, tucking her chin into her chest and pulling her knees up so that her forehead could rest on them.

It was another childhood movement. Allison wanted to be alone.

Cole sighed and stood, kissing the top of her head and brushing some hair behind her shoulders.

"Sorry Bells." He looked at House, but the man shook his head indicating that he was going to stay a little longer.

Cole shrugged and walked out of the room, eyeing House curiously.

House continued to stare at Cameron.

The position that she was in couldn't have been comfortable and House was waiting for her to shift so he could see her face.

He was a doctor, and had been for years. Of course he had had his fair share of amnesia patients.

Most had fallen into some form of depression when realizing that they had lost time and were in a completely different world then their family and friends.

Knowing Cameron, (at least he had always thought that he did) the moment the full extent of what her death had done to her family and friends hit her – well, he wasn't sure what exactly would happen – but he knew that it wouldn't be pretty.

House sat for another twenty minutes before Cameron finally unfolded her legs and stretched back out on the bed.

Her eyes were red, but she hadn't cried, House was almost positive. Her shoulders would have at least shaken – she would have made some noise.

No one could completely muffle their pain.

"What are you doing here?"

House shrugged. "I wanted to talk to you."

"About what?"

"What? You don't think that we have anything to talk about?"

Cameron shifted position and stared at him, face wary.

"That depends. Are you going to throw something I said back in my face?"

"Allison." His voice was exasperated. She ducked her head and he sighed. "No I'm not. But I would appreciate your full attention."

Cameron lifted her head to meet his eyes.

"I think I'm in love with you."

* * *

Matchmaker belongs to Fiddler On The Roof


	16. Chapter 15

So I know that I told everyone that my updates would start being less sporadic, and they will be soon, but I just got back from my final vacation of the summer with a group of friends. School starts a week from Tuesday, and things should start evening out then. This is the last chapter of More Then A Memory, and I may or may not be doing a sequel after I finish some stories. The next chapter of I'll Stand By You will probably be the last. Hope you enjoy!

Jess

* * *

**Chapter 15: Perfect**

House waited almost impatiently for Cameron to say something – anything.

She made no movement though, and just started at him eyes wide, breathing shallow.

Her eyes were searching his, frantically, and House idly wondered what she was looking for.

"This isn't some joke, right?"

Her voice was quavering and House understood that she was looking for the glimmer of laughter in his eyes that would signify soon he would be teasing her or swiping her mouth to test for HIV.

"Yes. It's a joke. This whole week has been my lying to you, and this is just the icing on the cake."

She flinched and House cupped her cheek in his hand. "You needed to take that test Allison. Otherwise I wouldn't have done that. And I knew me cornering you wouldn't have helped any. And this time I'm not kidding. I love you."

"Get out."

"What?"

She was trembling visibly and House wondered what he had done wrong this time. It wasn't like Chase or Foreman were in the room. And he wasn't kidding.

"I don't know what you think you can get this time. Because fake love isn't going to make me better. You can't fix me. Don't you get it? I'm not the one who needs damaged. You do. Get out. Get out. Get out. And don't come back!"

House stood because he knew that her blood pressure was skyrocketing and that she was close to having a breakdown.

It was all very dramatic and movie-like, and later, on House would be amused by their dialogue.

"I'm only leaving because you need to calm down. I'll be back later."

"Get out."

House paused at the door. His anger and irritation were growing, but he would wait until he was out the door.

"I do love you."

* * *

House stepped out of her room and shot a helpless look at Cole. The rest of the group had dispersed again, to where, House had no idea. But he didn't really care.

Richard, it seemed, was in the front of the clinic dealing with a patient.

"Mild car crash." Cole supplied helpfully. "There are four or five people with various bumps and bruises so they're helping out up front and in the main area."

The twenty-four hour treatment center had four personal rooms, and then eight beds that were set up, two behind each curtain.

There was also a room with an X-Ray machine. All in all, it was a very nice treatment center for such a small place.

"You should go in and talk to her," was House's only reply as he nodded his head. "Tell her she's wrong."

With that he disappeared out the side door and into Rudyard.

* * *

What the hell was he thinking?

He shouldn't have told her that.

Shouldn't have brought up love. It was stupid and backpedaling when she stared at him would have been the smarter idea.

House leaned against the side of the brick building, hitting his head against the wall repeatedly. He then popped about three Vicodins and sighed.

House needed a drink. And he needed it _now_.

Three times he had told Stacey he loved her.

The first it had just slipped out, the second time they had gone out for a nice dinner and he was mentally prepared for the hurdle he had set up for himself. While she told him quite often that she loved him, the words were usually followed by a _ditto_ or _me too._

The last time was right before he was put into the coma. And then the last _I love you _hadn't been a real declaration of love. It was been filled with pain, and a tinge of anger and regret.

After that, it was all downhill.

"What happened?"

Wilson's voice startled him. And House turned - cane in hand, swinging to hit Wilson in the shins absentmindedly.

"Woah." Wilson took a step back, just narrowly missing the wood whistling in the air. Nothing he wasn't used to though. "Not a good time?"

"Is it ever?" More Vicodin was swallowed down and Wilson took a tentative step closer.

"What happened?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing means something."

"If nothing means something does something mean nothing? If I tell you something happened does that mean you'll leave me alone?" House snapped.

Wilson retreated. When House was like this, no one could talk to him. Which meant that something big had happened.

* * *

"What'd I miss?"

"What?"

"House just walked out and told me to calm you down and then to tell you that you're wrong. So, I repeat, what did I miss."

"Oh." She went back to looking out the window. "He told me that he loved me and then I threw him out for being a sick bastard that's messing with my head."

"Hells Bells!"

"Ace!" He glared at her and she sighed. "What?"

"Don't give me those puppy dog eyes. They don't work on me."

"Yes they do." The pouting grew and Cole sighed.

"Maybe they do, but not this time."

"And why not?"

"Because I think he really does love you."

"Does not."

"I'm not going to get into a childish argument with you on this. I'm right, you're wrong. Trust me."

"How do you know he loves me? You've met him once."

"I met him at your funeral actually. And let me tell you, no one can fake that emotion. And if he could, one, he should've been an actor and two, he wouldn't have faked that at your funeral for God's sake. If you were alive and he was trying to mess with you, that would be something else. But-"

"I am alive. Therefore he's trying to mess with me." Allison cut in, an almost triumphant smile on her face. It hurt, but at least she hadn't risen to the bait this time.

"We thought you were dead for three months. We had a funeral Al. There's a grave stone with an empty box on the farm. It wasn't faked, sis. He really loves you. Besides, if he didn't love you why is he still here?"

Allison frowned. Eddie had told her that House loved her. House had kissed her. But still, the cold hard facts were the same. No one loved her unconditionally except for Cole, Nana, Gramps, and two or three close friends.

"I think you screwed up Hells Bells. Want me to go get him for you?"

Still frowning, Allison nodded.

* * *

"When Allie and I were born we weren't wanted."

Cole's voice startled House. He was still outside silently cursing himself in various languages.

"What?"

"Our parents didn't want us. We still debate why our mother didn't abort us. It wasn't against any beliefs she had. Our mother is a very cold and calculating woman, Dr. House. She only thinks about herself. Having an abortion wouldn't have affected her at all. That's why Allie tries to be perfect. When we were little she thought that if she was just _this much_ better at that, or had gotten an A instead of a B, got first place instead of second, did more then anyone else, if she was perfect that they would have loved us more. I went the opposite way and was a demon child." Cole grinned at some far off memory that consisted of childhood antics.

"Why exactly are you telling me this?"

"Because Hells Bells at this moment does not feel remotely close to perfect."

"And…"

Cole's face darkened momentarily. "She's scared Dr. House. One screw up and you'll go back on your words. Beside the fact she barely just got her memory back and you spent years teasing her about her crush on you."

House scowled. "If it took me this long to act on anything then she should understand that this isn't something I'll take lightly."

"What does she have to base that off of?"

"I don't know, but you'd think that after years she would understand me better." He paused for a minute to stare at Cole. "Why aren't you trying to kill me?"

"A few reason's actually. One, I don't want to go to jail. Two, even though Allie is scared at the moment, I think you two could really have something. Three, if I beat you up immediately then I have nothing to threaten you with if you do end up breaking her heart. Because then I will really kill you. According to Al, no one understands you. Why should she be any different?"

"Because she loves me."

Cole shook his head.

"Look: She's scared. No one has ever loved her unconditionally before. Nana and Gramps loved us of course, but that's not the same. She had her husband of course, and I was raised not to speak ill of the dead, but he was a manipulative bastard. And to this day I believe that's why he died. It's called karma." Cole shook his head and looked House in the eye.

"And suddenly after all the years of shit you put her through; you tell her you love her. That's not unconditional love to her, it means you want something, and you scared her. Not to mention all she's been put through over the past months. And you're talking in circles. Just go talk to Hells Bells and work it out."

* * *

"You wanted to talk to me?" House stepped back into Cameron's room and raised an eyebrow at her.

"Yes." She glanced down at the sheets she had twisted tightly in her hand and shook her head. "No." Cameron paused again and sighed. "Maybe."

"I knew I hired you for your great decision making skills." House limped into the room and settled into the chair he had previously occupied despite Cameron's indecision.

"I thought it was because of my great lobby art status?"

"That too. And your coffee."

She smiled and stared at the blanket again, immediately averting her eyes. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For asking you to leave."

"People have done worse." He wasn't going to accept her apology, but Cameron knew it was the closest thing that she would get.

"I know." She bit her lip. "I just- you told me you loved me once. What's going to stop you from using that trick again?"

"I never use the same trick twice. You of all people should know that. It's just -" House mock shuddered making Cameron laugh. "- so _lame_." He frowned, suddenly, his expression turning serious. "Trust me on this one, it's not a trick or a joke or a lie. I was a mess when you disappeared. Ask Wilson. Ask Cuddy. Hell, ask Chase and Foreman or my new team. You know that stupid saying about not knowing what you've got until it's gone?"

Allison nodded. "But I left before."

"But you weren't gone."

"Yes I was."

"Not dead." House moved his hand and stroked some hair away from her face. "I could always get you back when you were alive. But you were dead and I needed you. And then-" is hand moved to grasp hers. "- I got a phone call from an old friend, saying they had an unidentifiable woman that he thought might have been you. She was in an accident and unrecognizable. But it wasn't you. And that just broke me a little more. Cemented the fact that you were really gone."

"And then Richard wrote."

House sighed. "Yep. Got a letter from Richie-Boy. And it was you. Alive. And then here I was, ready to see you and sweep you back to Princeton and never let you leave. I showed up, and you took one look at me and flipped out."

Allison frowned, not liking his choice of words. House caught her eye and shrugged.

"What would you like me to call it instead?"

"Something that doesn't make me sound crazy."

He rolled his eyes. "The point of this story is not to make you sound crazy. The point is that I love you and I'm not lying. Got it?"

Allison grinned. If it was a trick House would have dropped it earlier. He loved her – he did, he _really_ did – and she felt content.

Content to sit with this new version of House, this side that he had never let anyone see. It was nice to just be loved.

* * *

When Cole reappeared later he found his sister curled into House, as House watched her, face expressionless.

"So I'm guessing it all worked out?"

"Nah." Allison replied. "I'm paying him to fake everyone out."

"Of course."

"And no one can talk to a horse, of course." Allison responded, not missing a beat.

"That is, of course, unless the horse is the famous Mister Ed."

"Did you two ever consider going on the road?" House eyed the two of them. Such weird siblings with such weird quirks.

"Of course," they chorused before dissolving into laughter.

Cole shook his head. "Not why I came in here though. Richard wants to release you but they sent me in because I've seen you naked – although not since we were like, three - and they didn't want to scar anyone."

"Cole Cameron! You are impossible!" Allison fumed. "There's nothing in here that I can throw or you would be the one with a concussion right now."

"I know." Cole grinned and darted over to kiss his sisters' forehead affectionately. "I'll give Richard the all clear. Perk up Hell's Bells you know you love me."

He was out of the room before she could yell at him again.

* * *

_Three Weeks Later_

Allison buried her face in Iris' shoulder.

Maybe if she _just. didn't. move._ –

"Allie."

"No."

Iris tugged her firmly from her shoulder, face just as tear-stained. "We all knew it would happen. It's just sooner rather then later. And it's not like you're leaving forever."

House would have tapped his cane impatiently and dragged Allison away if not for the fact that these people had taken care of her when he couldn't and the fact that Allison would've never forgiven him.

So he waited with a mock patience as Cameron said her good-byes to her friends for one last time before the large group departed for a long car ride and an even longer plane ride.

Cameron cried as she hugged Ollie and then Eddie good-bye as well, before tucking herself firmly under Houses' arm. Most of the people that Cameron associated with here had said good-bye yesterday, including Richard.

"Ready?"

"As ready as I'll ever be."

There were still a lot of things to come, House knew. A meeting with her grandparents, where they were stopping before boarding the plane home, seeing the parents, getting a new apartment - though House was pretty sure that he had taken care of that one. He had offered to let her stay with him, and he was pretty sure that she wouldn't be leaving - new clothes, getting re-associated with the world, with Princeton, with her job.

Allison looked up, as if sensing the frown on his face. She darted up and kissed him quickly on the lips.

"I'll be fine, I promise."

And then there was another thing. _Them._ They were something that wasn't nothing. Or something as vaguely identifiable as that. They were past friends but not quiet dating. Not friends with benefits because they weren't sleeping together. A word that was in between.

Allison hugged everyone one last time, her tears still flowing steadily.

She turned to look at House and then sighed. "I'm ready."

And with one last sniffle and then a step Allison Cameron stepped back towards her Princeton Family, back towards what was once, and would be again, home.

THE END

* * *

Allison and Cole are quoting the lyrics to the Mr. Ed theme song. Um, yeah…


End file.
